Trying to get my ducks in a row
Tuesday, April 26, 2016
I have a scheduled appointment with an orthopedist for tomorrow to see about knee surgery at the end of May. I have a scheduled appt with my sleep and breathing doctor during the second week of May because I will need surgical clearance, and also with my psychiatrist that week. I am really anxious about a number of things so I am trying to meet with a new psychologist ASAP to help me. I have tears and fears and numerous areas of concern. I'm drowning in clutter and I've been working on it, but it's an almost overwhelming task. We have a dog and a cat. The dog is a rescue and we must keep him because we both love him, however I am having so much trouble with seemingly everything that caring for our animals is causing me a lot of stress. Two of our grands are allergic to our cat. She is shedding everywhere, and the grands get itchy watery eyes when they are here. She is semi-feral and won't let us pick her up or hold her. She scratched both my husband and me twice last week when we tried to put her in a crate to take to the vet for her shots which are past due. We can't catch her because of our painful knees and her craftiness. She is an inside/outside cat and she and the dog have a love/hate relationship which causes me stress. She mothers him, and he nips at her ears and chases her. He plays too rough. I am having enough trouble taking care of Milo, the dog, and the two of them are too much. I want to send her to a farm where her sisters live or to another farm where she would be with other barn cats, and I'm feeling guilty about it and grieving at the decision I've made to give her away the same time.
Okay, I've made some phone calls and things are falling into place... I've stopped seeing my situation as an out and out catastrophe. (sigh) But my shoulders are still tense and I'm anxious, but in control. I'm exhausted from not getting enough sleep last night, but managing to reach out to take care of things that need to be done today, and planning for tomorrow.