100,000-149,999 SparkPoints 109,435

You are beautiful. Now smile.

Thursday, March 31, 2016

You are beautiful. You ARE beautiful. We all have our own beautiful parts, and we should celebrate them.

I was raised by a Mom who thought talking about attributes, beauty, intelligence, etc. was totally wrong. She was wrong.

When I had my daughter, she was a beauty. People stopped me all the time and said in front of her (sometimes it made me cringe), she is so beautiful, she has beautiful eyes. I would just smile and we would walk on. One time visiting Grammy, she said, Mommy, I have beautiful eyes. My Mom looked at me with horror. I knew why she said it, and told her, I know, honey, but we don't have to talk about it. You ARE beautiful. My Mom told me I had done the wrong thing. I don't think so. My DD has a great self image, and I think it is because she FEELS it.

She is still beautiful, inside and out, even when she has purple hair.

I saw this video yesterday, and PLEASE take the time to watch it. It made my day. It is a high school girl telling kids she doesn't know that they are beautiful. It is worth your time.


You are beautiful.

Spark on.
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • FITNIK2020
    The music is by a Montreal group I love...& I have a single comment: all of these " things " are people who are transformed by their reactions, a smile will change you from the inside, and anger will tear your beauty down.
    1840 days ago
    My parents were not into laying on the compliments, but I can well remember my Dad once telling me I had a beautiful smile and my Mum saying we looked lovely if we had made an extra effort with our hair or clothing. I always tell my girls that they are beautiful and precious to me and if they cringe or try to tone me down, I tell them to stop that and just take the compliment because in my eyes they are lovely and deeply loved.
    Then they smile and say "Oh, Mum...", but I can see that they glow and walk away with confidence in their step. That is so important!
    1843 days ago
    LOVE IT!!! I ALWAYS make it a point to tell people when I like their hair, shirt, jacket, style and my hubby thinks it is SO WEIRD and tries to stop me all the time!!! I tell him, "I know they look at me like I'm a weirdo but I just made that persons day!!!"
    1845 days ago
  • FRAN0426
    Thanks so much for sharing this video . No one should ever tell someone they are not beautiful. We are all beautiful humans. Many are more beautiful than others, but some are more beautiful in personality, or caring etc. doesn't matter we all are beautiful.
    1846 days ago
  • HOLLYM48
    I think children should be told they are beautiful, but not outside beauty is not the most important part, the beauty within is the most important part of them. I think children need to be told they are pretty because kids are mean, the kids in school can make people feel ugly and small and building them up is so important. Thanks for this beautiful blog! We are all beautiful! I agree.
    1846 days ago
    Great blog. Thanks for sharing.
    My mother always said . "You can find beauty in everything. All you have to do is look for it." That has always been my outlook. Whether it's the oak tree growing in front of my house that I see every day, or the little green and brown lizards that are scurrying around in the flower beds, there is so much beauty that it will take a lifetime to realize it all.
    1847 days ago
  • PICKIE98
    My mother was very cruel and abusive. Physically, emotionally and verbally, all of our lives. She will be 90 years old soon and she is not mean at all now, but she has no friends, her family wants nothing to do with her, she has abused us all continuously. She has never been sick, now has dementia and has had a very easy, spoiled life. The rest of our lives have been scarred by this one vicious person...
    1847 days ago
    I can't remember my parents ever telling me I was beautiful. I think in the UK many people still consider it wrong to tell your children they are beautiful. But how ridiculous that we can see the beauty in a sunset, or a field of flowers, or a work of art, but not in our own children's smiling faces! I tell my kids they are beautiful all the time, and I tell my cats too!

    I think it's a wonderful thing to know there is at least one person in the world who finds you beautiful, as that lovely video proved!
    1847 days ago
    I loved the video- I watched it some time ago and those smiling faces made me smile.
    I think it is very important to let our children know how beautiful they are. I didn't have that growing up, but as I grew into adulthood I realized it wasn't a sin, and that the thing that made me most beautiful was the light from within. Granny used to say Beauty is as beauty does. Thanks for sharing and helping us remember that We need to love ourselves and speak kindly to ourselves

    Bless you!
    1847 days ago
    Beautiful blog and video...full of insight and wisdom!
    How sad is it that so many of us never remember being told we were beautiful and feeling so unsure of ourselves! I have my nightmare memories done to me by relatives, etc! In this day and age of bullying and trying to live up to so many standards, I don't think you can tell a child to much about their beauty and greatness!
    Thank you for this important message!
    1847 days ago
    You are beautiful as well, my friend. I'm smiling. Hugs, Sandi
    1847 days ago
    1847 days ago
    I don't know what moved me more - the video, or Dottie's comments about her mom. I'm all "verklempt" now, and not sure I can keep typing, but here goes...

    I had a friend many years ago talk about "new dress syndrome," where a woman would buy a new dress, and suddenly everyone was telling her how beautiful she was. The theory is that if women always walk around thinking that they're wearing a new dress, they will always feel beautiful.

    The truth is that most of us - even the most conventionally attractive people - think internally that we aren't good looking. When we are told that we are, we instantly change. Did you notice in that video how, once being given the compliment, it was like their face bloomed like a rose. Every single person in that video WAS beautiful, and the fact that most of them didn't believe it is a tragedy of the utmost proportions.

    I'm sorry that people of your mom's generation (and Dottie's mom's mom too) thought that we shouldn't be told that we're beautiful (vanity was a sin, of course). The damage that message brings is horrific. I wasn't told I was good looking (I usually got comments like "You look like a Dutch boy with those chubby cheeks!") but I certainly wasn't told I was ugly. And I got enough people telling me I was handsome to at least give me some semblance of self confidence as i reached adulthood. (Yet, when my boss introduces me as the handsome Director of Campus Operations, I totally cringe!)

    Yes, we are beautiful. We are gorgeous. And I hope that we spend the rest of our lives telling everyone we meet those words. What a gift to give someone else - the gift of beauty and self-confidence!

    Thank you for the most touching blog post I've read today. Love you, my friend. I can't want to put my arms around you and tell you that you are beautiful!
    1847 days ago
  • L*I*T*A*
    1847 days ago
  • no profile photo CD16110307
    I was told I'd never be considered beautiful and to get over myself.
    1847 days ago
    I was lucky to have a mom who didn't go along with the standards of the day. I'm not sure if I was ever told I was beautiful but I certainly understood that I was. More importantly, she was very proud of all my accomplishments - at least until I grew up and had a mind of my own!!!

    Your daughter is very beautiful!
    1847 days ago
  • no profile photo JEANNETTE59
    Thank you, Jane.

    My Mother told me that when she was a little girl she asked her mother, "If she thought she was pretty?" Her mother answered, "No you are as ugly as blue mud."

    Mom was 5"2' with blue eyes and blond hair and she was as beautiful on the inside as she was on the outside. I was her caregiver for the last 10 years of her life. She was in almost constant pain and never complained.

    Toward the end of her life she started to have horrible nightmares. It got so bad that her doctor had a psychologist come to the house. At one point she asked me to leave the room and i knew she wanted to ask Mom questions about me and how I treated her.

    She called me back in and said that Mom told her no one could take better care of her. Then she asked me if there was anything that Mom had told me about her youth or family, some painful memory that might be triggering the nightmares?

    I said just one and asked Mom to tell her what her mother had said about not being pretty. She did and suddenly the missing piece to the nightmares was remembered. It was blue mud! Sometimes children and adults throwing it at her, her mother scrubbing her face with it, her brother pushing her down in it etc.

    Mom had never been able to remember that part of the nightmares, when she woke up screaming. It was only then that we realized how much damage her mother's words had done. The nightmares stopped immediately.

    Mom lived to be 90 years old and died at home in my arms.

    I tell this story in the hopes that it helps both those who have been injured by cruel words and those who speak without considering the consequences of their words.


    emoticon Dottie
    1847 days ago
  • PHOENIX1949
    1847 days ago
    emoticon emoticon
    1847 days ago
    I love that video! I've seen it before and I had the same reaction today as I had before. It touches my heart!
    1848 days ago
    Another wonderful message----
    Healthy self-esteem is a beautiful thing. When we are confident and assured of ourselves, we are open to the joys of life.-- And we can look beyond ourselves to the needs of others..
    Hugs for you... and thank you!
    1848 days ago
  • no profile photo CD13354694
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1848 days ago
    1848 days ago
  • no profile photo CD15520036
    My mother told me the reason she didn't tell us we were nice looking is that it was the parenting wisdom of the day - if you say these things, children will get big headed. She said she really believed it. I'm glad she told me because it gave me a kinder view of the fact she never praised us.
    1848 days ago
    1848 days ago
    1848 days ago
    1848 days ago
    This is a wonderful video! Thanks for sharing.
    1848 days ago
    1848 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment

    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

More Blogs by JJMPLSMN