Doomed to repeat history...
Monday, February 22, 2016
I have a bad habit of using Spark for a while, then disappearing. It's been over a year since I last logged in, and I thought I'd look at some past blogs... here are some highlights from my first blog in May of 2011...
-I can't believe I allowed myself to become so lazy and put on this weight.
-I'm still bitter about gaining almost 30 pounds in the months before my wedding.
-I'm uncomfortable in anything that isn't loose jeans and a loose top.
-I have a closet overflowing with cute, trendy clothes that I can't even squeeze into
-The worst part? I think... no, I KNOW it wouldn't take much to get my weight back down.
-I snack on anything I can get my hands on like a grazing cow.
-Instead of working out, even for 15 - 20 minutes, I make excuses...
-I am wasting time that I could be feeling amazing and being healthy
-I have high cholesterol
-I'm waiting to have kids until my early 30's
-I have a high risk of cancer and diabetes.
And here I am AGAIN, nearly 5 YEARS since this post... and I'm exactly where I was then. Same thoughts, same problems, same overflowing closet, same excuses. Except now I'm IN my early 30's (will be 32 in 2 months), and obviously haven't learned anything from my history. And as the saying goes, I am doomed to repeat it.
So... I guess I need to see that the wishful thinking, waiting for some magic motivation, making excuses, and starting "tomorrow" just won't work.
I do know that tracking my food helps. A lot. The one time a few years ago that I managed to lose 20 pounds was all thanks to calorie counting and lots of healthy foods (read, veggies!). Plus drinking lots of water. So there are 2 tools I know I need to use.
The thing I struggle with most, and is probably the thing I need to really get me out of this cycle, is exercise. I'm a collector...I have countless DVD's, I've printed dozens of workout plans, I have various workout equipment... but sadly none of it works unless you actually USE it.
I actually started a weight loss challenge with a few other ladies here at my new office (moved last fall), but sadly we're all struggling, and more sadly I'm the most positive of us. I've lost a little weight since we started at the beginning of January, but I'm already slipping up with my food tracking (if I eat poorly I just don't track anything), and gained for the first time since starting the challenge.
So, I am getting back on track with my food tracking, and commit to track even bad choices that make me go over my goal. I will also plan to work out at least 3 times this week, and will stay off the couch until at least 8pm. Time to change my future!