Tuesday, December 22, 2015
I'm not making this a pity party, but I do need to get real about how I've been feeling, for some time now. I'm needing to work through my swirly head and get back on track with our food choices and work around our hectic schedules to find what will work best. I'm so rigid and I seem to lose my focus when "life" doesn't go accordingly. My thought process (due to anxiety) has to keep a daily routine, well routine! I've been off focus, since Thanksgiving, which I'm sure is typical. Christmas is not as chaotic, since we are not traveling and we will only have the boys. (Although at times they can rattle my nerves, as teenagers do). And as I get honest and real about our health, I opened my mind to learn how to shoot a gun. I'll be working on making a list of things I want to learn. As this is not a want or a need, but more of a growth outside the comfort zone! I have gotten real about ALOT of things in my life and feel it's time for another real growth spurt. I'm 2 months being a non smoker and I feel better. I do not wake up every morning coughing up my lung for 30 minutes. It is a great feeling! I want and need to build on that. Lately I have just gone through the motions. I don't follow a particular weight loss diet, I have changed about 95% of my eating habits, still have some issues to work on. I have never been one who ate breakfast in the morning. Just coffee and my creamer, which I still struggle wanting a cigarette with, so I have cut down, but not completely out. I still use my ecig and I am now trying to do portion control on my creamer. 30 calories in a mini creamer with 5g of sugar. I think the next "beast" to conquer will be my sugar addiction. Over the years I have tamed it down, way down, as junk food all sugary from cakes to soda were my staples. I don't have complete control over the sugar beast yet. I still have a weakness for ice cream, which is staying on my absolutes for now. And dark chocolate. I have given up soda, over a year now, on occasion I'll have a craving, but find if I have a coke zero, I realize I didn't really miss it. So how do I get there with some of the other beasts????
Ok so if you've made it this far thank you for reading. I have learned we are all creatures of habit. We all have our beasts that we must conquer and comfort zones that either need to be stretched or no longer serve their purpose. This is why we must get honest with ourselves!