ZAIVALA
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Catching up

Monday, November 23, 2015

I'm still getting settled in to my cabin, although a lot of the settling in is just feeling unsettled. I've been eating more than I "should" -- that year of living with my last girlfriend and starving myself down to 205 has resulted in a lot of "catching up", and I've caught up to 265 again. I'm in a situation where I easily could get exercise, like on my 7 acres of woods with hiking trails on the property I'm living on, and just haven't done it. I may have to be here a while longer before it feels like home. My debt has gone up rather than down (mostly due to the move, but also some other poor decisions and a few good ones), and I have to keep my job to stay afloat -- although if my debt was wiped out, I could stay afloat without the job, but that's not likely to happen unless (kein ein houra) my mother dies and leaves me a lot of money. I'm still keeping my SSDI check and my job, have not exceeded my earnings level but there have been some close calls.

But overall, everything that has happened to me in the past year has been amazingly good, probably so much so that a lot of my stress is waiting for the proverbial other shoe to drop. If I can get used to the fact that it's not dropping, I can get my life back in gear.

And yes, The Lady Mary, I'm still drinking gallons of water per day. That has not been a problem. And with this blog I hit 300 points for the month, I'm pretty sure I have a string of months with that although it has been a while since I hit 500.

Would somebody please tell me to relax and enjoy the scenery? I have it made, if I don't lose it myself. And if I relax it will be a lot easier to have the energy to get back into shape and watch my diet. I've already made the choice and started the journey of getting refined carbs moved out of my life, but when you're poor that's often all you can afford. No excuses, I have started buying brown rice and even whole wheat pasta. I'm eating less meat than most Americans, and trying hard to keep it to birds and fish (no mammals). But keeping a meal plan is not yet a possibility, and I'm only beginning to talk myself into thinking about moving toward exercise (see how many levels there are? LOL).

In the meantime, I'm learning. I have performed more over the past two years than at any time since I was singing on the street curbs of Denver in the late 70s and early 80s. I haven't sold very many copies of my CD but it was a miracle that I got donations which covered all the recording expenses except printing. I'm hoping 2016 will be a breakout year for me.

I guess that's enough rambling for now. I hope you are all doing better than I am at your weight goals, and that life in general is treating you well. If not, well, I'm proof that nobody's perfect, and am here to talk if you need to.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • WOWEETOO
    hey my sweet moss hang in there my friend you can do it..most of these upheavals in life are there to pave the way for bigger and better surprises for sure don't worry about the weight gain you know how to do it i have practically no meat in my diet also but it's so expensive and i just don't have it available had to replace the water heater and the heat pump and you know you gotta have heat and air conditioning to live in tennessee you will make it and yes i am still out here for you just not on here for more than a few friends because i have so little time most of the time don't kknow where it all goes i sit with my aunt who has deepening dementia and sometimes that is so depressing but it's soomething i need to do both for her and discipline for myself so my friend have a great thanksgiving and know i am still out here and care very much what happens to you
    the lady mary
    1088 days ago
  • TRIPLE_EMME
    It is good to read your update. I've missed you.

    Try to take a moment during the stress to do some deep breathing.
    1088 days ago
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