Thursday, October 22, 2015
So I got the exciting adventure of a (very short) trip to Atlanta last weekend, to attend the wedding of a dear friend from my growing-up years. It was fun to be "jet set" and it was REALLY fun to meet a whole bunch of new people, all in joyous, celebratory moods. All welcoming, and witty.
I got to be a "sparkly houseguest" for a few days. No kids. No cleaning. No job.
Lots of champagne.
I wanted to post here because I ALSO (for the first time in a VERY long number of years) got to feel really confident about how I look. With not quite 30 pounds gone, I look very much more like my "old self." I feel very much more like my insides match my outsides.
I still have about 15 pounds to go before I reach my goal weight. But in many ways, this past weekend, I feel like I have arrived. Arrived at a place where I feel confident and beautiful. Where I look damn good for my age. Where I can enjoy clothes again. I am still working toward my goals, but with even more energy and positivity, if that makes sense. Because my motivation is now not some future, far-off, hoped-for result... it's what I see in the mirror every day. Now, when I go to the gym, my inner voice is saying "you are working out to KEEP this." (Not, "you are working out to achieve this at some future, mythical date.")
I theorized a while back that there might be a sort of "tipping point" especially with lifting weights thrown into the mix. A point at which my body would have gained enough new muscle, that even at rest I'd be burning more calories and the weight loss would start to pick up (or become easier). And I'm THERE. I am ACTUALLY THERE. I eat about 500 more calories a day than I did when I started this journey... and I'm still losing.
More importantly, I've reached a tipping point with attitude and motivation. My motivation has gone from something external that I really had to work hard cultivate... to something inside me, that feels grateful for what I have accomplished and feels awesome about my lifestyle and proud of who I am becoming. I used to panic fairly often about backsliding or falling off the wagon (I've been sidelined many, many times). That's going away. I got this. I know what I'm doing (finally) and even if I screw up a day or two (which does happen), I know it doesn't mean the end of my journey.
Anyway... feeling super positive and wanted to share that there are SO MANY BABY STEPS to celebrate along the way. I still have a ways to go, but I feel as happy and proud and "there" as if I'd already hit my goal weight.