Thursday, August 20, 2015
I'm back home now, hopefully for good. I signed up for another degree so that I can hopefully find a local job. I have been trying to decide what to do about becoming a mother. I'm back to trying to get pregnant using a donor but I have to close my adoption file since I moved out of the province. I was looking into international adoption and public (foster care) adoption but it's just more red tape and hurdles. It's so stressful. I know I haven't been on this journey as long as some women but it's been over two years and I'm tired of waiting.
I'm pretty sure I'm going to try IVF next spring/summer. The clinic I've talked to says they can do IVF at my current weight but I want to be lower. I don't want my weight to be the reason IVF fails. I joined BLC29 in hopes that I will be able to get my eating under control. I have been vegan for a few months now but I'm still eating a lot of junk.
I know that this journey is going to be very hard... it's been very hard since I joined SP almost 10 years ago! I need to do it though and every pound I lose will increase my chances of IVF succeeding. I'm hoping to track my food consistently. I'm not sure if I'm going to use SP, pen and paper, or another website. No matter what I need to be accountable for what I'm putting in my mouth.