NIKKIG3
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Fat People Pictures

Thursday, June 18, 2015

Posting new pictures of myself was one of my many Spark goals this year. And I was actually very excited to finally get to post new pictures of myself until..... I ACTUALLY STARTED TO LOOK FOR PICTURES.

This year I have taken more pictures of myself then past years so I was so proud of myself. Before today I thought "wow, I will have some really great photos to share with SP". To my surprise most of the pictures I have take are head-shots. "Where is the rest of my body?"

This was very disturbing and really sadden me because I knew I was not happy with my body but my gosh... I did not even realize that it was to this extent that I would totally cut my body out completely. I have no comparison pictures, cute outfit pictures, goofy pictures or anything!!!! Just a face. Which led me to another question, clearly I've been uncomfortable in my own skin for quite a while so what the hell.... how do I keep regressing to this point? Case and point for the last two going on 3 months I have been losing and gaining the same 5lbs.

I spoke to a friend of mine who is also trying to lose weight and when I told her this she just laughed because she does the same thing or hide behind her children or other people. How am I suppose to change my body if I cant even stand looking at myself. I mean "my whole self" if I did not even realize I had such deep rooted despise for my body? This was a huge eye opener for me.

So after a good laugh with one of my best friends, I've decided to take the high road and learn a lesson from this experience. Starting with no more head shots!


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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • COOP9002
    Sounds like you've got the attitude you need to get to where you want to be.

    Blessings on your journey.
    2041 days ago
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    2041 days ago
  • no profile photo CD11519434
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    2041 days ago
  • no profile photo CD11519434
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    2041 days ago
  • DANIELLET96
    Good for you. It takes courage to face your challenges but you are better off from doing so. I used to be the same way but finally stopped hiding . My body is beautiful no matter the weight -it is just HEALTHIER when the weight is off.

    Keep at it and you will succeed!

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    2041 days ago
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