PORTIAWILLIS
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Prayer

Saturday, May 30, 2015

Lord help me as it is clear I can't help myself. I just don't know what to do anymore. I can't seem to even make it a day without giving in to temptation. I start off with good intentions but that doesn't last long. Before I know it I am eating when not even hungry. I just keep thinking that nothing ever works so what is the use. I know that is the absolute wrong thing to think but in all honesty that is the way I feel. Why do I feel like that? I know that it is my fault and no one else's so WHY? I try to tell myself that I have to do this for my health but that doesn't work any better than doing it for vanity's sake. I want to do it for my family, but that is no better. I am not depressed, angry, unhappy, I love my job, family life is good, still can't stop eating. I am ready to talk to my doctor about weight loss surgery or have him put me in the nut house. How can someone want something so bad and still keep doing the very thing that they don't want to do. I feel like an addict.

Ok rant is over. Maybe if I just start small like the spark plan says I will do better. I have always been an all or nothing sort of girl. If I couldn't do it perfect I just give up. Well like I have said before I refuse to give up. I will get healthy, lose weight and have less pain.

my goals for the next week
1. drink no cokes
2. track all my food
3. drink 90 oz of water daily
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • WOUBBIE
    Carbs are addicting, and like any addiction, the only way off the roller coaster is to go cold turkey, cut them to the very minimum, and eat food that satiates you instead. I haven't looked at your food tracker, but I would guess that you might be trying to go low carb and low fat at the same time. If you're not getting your energy from carbs then you HAVE to get it from fat. Don't give up, just try a new angle!
    1119 days ago
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    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.
 

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