Wednesday, May 20, 2015
Last week I shared 3 Feelings Tools to help you feel feelings (it's a skill!). This week I've got 3 Thinking Tools to help you manage your mind. www.sparkpeople.com/mypa
Be Kind. This is non-negotiable. I'll say this over and over. No beating yourself up. No judgy-ness. Just be curious about what's happening, why it's happening, and its ripple effect.
Facts vs. Thoughts. Think of a problem. Spend a few minutes writing it out on paper. Now, go back to what you wrote and underline the objective facts. These are things that would hold up in a court of law, things outside of your control. Those are facts. Now notice everything that's left - those are thoughts. Those thoughts, opinions, judgments are the story you're making around the facts. How does that story make you feel? How would you like to feel around that story?
Quality Questions. One of my teachers, Brooke Castillo, refers to our brain as being like an unsupervised child. If you allow your brain to run rampant, you'll end up with a scattered mess. One of the best ways to manage your brain is to ask yourself quality questions. This is the difference between "Why can't I get a job?" and "How can I get a different job?". It's "Why can't I lose weight?" vs. "How can I lose weight and enjoy the process?". Your brain will go to work regardless of the question you ask it. It's an evidence-seeking, pattern-distinguishing machine. Why not have it work FOR you instead of against you?