PJH2028
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Taking the show on the road

Friday, May 08, 2015

Moving
Place
Moving
story lines connections
people places things

Furniture, artwork, photos, boxes of history, papers, rugs, linens, dishes, cookware, lamps and boxes and bins and
my good ness …. There is so much here … Chanel…. clothes city clothes….
This life of mine here…. I want to inhabit it. I never have.
Winchester scrunched and scrunched … I hoarded my things and could not see them… did not have the space to use them nicely.
Here I do.
And … I want to do that.
Really I'd like to be doing that starting now.
Yet I accept that there are many reasons my paths have brought me and others here

Oh. My. So many emotions this past week. Crying at finally liking this apartment… seeing my things … embraced by them. Realizing I must take this house apart and EMPTY it again. Make room for Renters. Renting it for a YEAR (a long time. just a year. a short time. Time time. T.s. Elliot/Four Quartets . Time). The brainchild of fiscal management. Wanting to recoup some ca$h. And… in the trudging maintenance of having gone out to California with Joe. Building a life out there FOR HIM. And enjoying it myself, too. Doesn't really suit me.
The place? The circumstances? Dunno.

There are many stories that have been unfolding and folding and unfolding
Origami of relations
and Sceneries

Joe in California - a part of me -
maybe we can keep that together
maybe i can be "bi-coastal"
Chicago main house
California for winters?
Something maybe.

For now…
I box it all up. Again.
Exercise-ing.
Just like exercising.
A lot of sweat.
Building muscles.
Finding out what we're made of.
Testing the limits.

So many of my things have memories attached to them.
Inhereited a lot o hand me downs from me mum. And others.
Stories in things.
Hmmm.

Empty space is SO changed by things.
THink of set design.
Lighting.
LEARN THIS PJ
Strike this set.
Make a new one in a year.
Take the show on the road.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • AAAACK
    We moved from a capacious home to a much smaller home, garage and workshop and huge yard to a postage stamp of a yard. It took me a while to embrace the different way of living, and, at this point, 9 years in, I have to say that there are benefits to both ways of existing, and it depends on my frame of mind as to whether I can appreciate them, or get irritated by them. Truth: I can live anywhere, I can find happiness anywhere, I just need to remember to do it. Sometimes in a small place things feel overwhelming faster, but then, in a small place, a small amount of work shows the progress quicker. Does that make sense? It's how I feel, but I'm not sure I'm putting it into the right words (migraine brain again).
    1138 days ago
  • PJH2028
    I wonder if there is any relation between
    Squeezing so much of myself into SO SMALL a container of HOUSE
    so small a venue of work - squishing my talents -- for later… or too shy or…

    I wonder if there is a relation and irony
    tween that
    and the body
    size of the body
    swelling and inflating of consumption
    food and unknown stuff
    looking to SATE a hunger
    a drive

    mis placed

    cuz FLOW FLOW FLOW
    is OPEN
    not squished

    and FLOW is what I seek
    NOW

    1139 days ago
  • JAMBABY0
    good for you
    1139 days ago
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