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Are you ready for some FOOTBALL?!? Um... maybe?

Sunday, April 05, 2015

Ahh, Easter in Michigan, where you never know year to year what it's going to be like. Will there be four feet of snow on the ground and all the eggs will be well and truly hidden until May? Or will it be sunny and beautiful and picture perfect? Today it was the latter. YAAAAASS. And I have finally rid myself of my cold. The asthma, though... heh.

Last night I went out for drinks with the girls... and you have no idea how weird that is, because that is something I rarely do... but I was with my sale-set crew last night, and I'm going to lose one of them as my old regular is now back from maternity leave, so we all decided to go hang out at Applebees after work. It was hilaaaaaarious. I love these women. I had one margarita, as I am not normally a drinker and had a ways to get home. We did the 3 for 12 appetizer thing, which is a small sampler of whatever ones you pick, so for me it was a mozz stick, two potstickers, and a few chips. I had eaten fairly light all day so I didn't break the bank nor feel guilty. Hell, I rarely feel guilty. *lol* Fun was had by all, and I got home about 1 in the morning. UnHusband was already asleep, so I ended up staying up filling out these health surveys for a genome project through UofM...

And here's what I came here for. Easter morning was spent with my family, doing fun kiddie activities with my niece. We went outside and used up about a gallon of bubble solution much to her delight. We were using these huge wands that she tried to blow through at first, but then once we showed her how to move the wand through the air she had a ton of fun yelling, "Wave it! Wave it!" while doing just that. Afternoon was spent at my other family's house, and by other family I mean my friend and her family whom I've known since we were six years old. Her brother has three sons, all under the age of 10, and they are strange little boys indeed. They are... well, whiny. They're pretty wishy-washy, act far younger than what they really are, and never want to be outside. The toys and games are inside, and you have to physically take them outside and bar the door behind you. Today we snagged a Nerf football and headed outside to toss it about. This was at about 3:30. Eli, the oldest, just wanted to sit underneath the willow tree and whine about being outside. Ben, the youngest, decided to just get underfoot and cling to people and not actually partake in catch. Gabe, the middle son, the one we think might actually turn out normal, tried oh-so-hard to throw and catch and he was so bad at it but he never gave up. So there we are, Jonathan (my UnHusband), Mark (the father of the boys) and me, throwing around this Nerf ball, laughing our butts off because we're soooooo bad, because the ball has laces but no grip (it hadn't been used yet), and we're competing with stiff winds and sun in our eyes. Eventually we all found a throwing technique we were comfortable with, and hey, I throw pretty damn good!

About an hour into our game Ben, for reasons unknown, started taunting me. "hey old lady! OLD LADY!!" I joked that he must be trying to get Sara's attention as she is older than I am. He said, "Noooo, I'm talking to YOU. YOU'RE OLD!" "Am not," I retort, "You need to check your perspective, son." Then Eli joined in. This is where it got interesting. "HEY OLD FAT LADY! YOU'RE OLD AND FAT!" Ohhhhh hell no. I proceeded to lambaste this child up one side and down the other with scathing logic, letting him know in no uncertain terms that my size and age was none of his concern, and THEN I went for the ol' ego by asking him why he's choosing to taunt me when I'm the one out playing football with the big boys while he's sitting under the tree whining and NOT playing.

Oh, and there was the part where I picked him up with one hand and Ben with the other and carried them towards Sara for further discipline. THAT freaked them out. And I mean I cleared them off the ground. I was not called old or fat after that.

At some point, Big Papa (father of Sara and Mark) and Uncle Kenny (brother-in-law of Big Papa) came outside to watch the shenanigans, and Big Papa joined in the tossing of the foamskin. We were laughing like lunatics, cracking jokes, mixing our sports references... like when Mark got clipped with the football. "DUDE! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO FLOP!!" When Jonathan twisted his leg in a gopher hole. "Party foul!" Ben clinging like a monkey to Mark's back. "PENALTY FLAG!" Gabe sliding across the grass to kick the football away from my outstretched hands. "SAFE!"

At first, my asthma was threatening to take me out the game... but after I removed my platform shoes and cardigan, tied my hair back, drank some water, and got serious... it held off. I was breathing better than I have in weeks. :) Unfortunately, I too sustained my own injuries. My right arm is bright red from impact with the football, my left wrist is acting up, I jammed a few of the fingers on my left hand, and I accidentally stepped on a sticker from the bush behind me. Ugh. Missed a perfect catch because the sticker sank into my heel and.... ugh. And yet I didn't break a single nail. :D

oh yeah, and then there was that spectacular backwards tuck-n-roll I did when Jonathan and I were rasslin' over the football. I twisted out of his arms, went down, and did this marvelous reverse somersault over my left shoulder and came up with the ball in my hands. I am awesome.

We ended up playing until 6. What was funny was how Jonathan teased me about being a girl and being the first one to call it quits, but as soon as I walked over to him and said I was out of gas they ALL called it quits. Y'd think the male ego would have made them stay out a bit longer to prove their worth or something, but they're just as worn as I. *lol*

I had a blast. They had a blast. We were sweaty and filthy and in great moods. Jonathan and I went home, got cleaned up, and now we're stiffly limping around our apartment trying to work out the kinks. We're plotting what we need to keep in his trunk for future outdoor shenanigans. Sneakers, more socks, a frisbee and a kickball... and plenty of water.
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