Needing some help...

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Its been a little over a week on my detox diet and although the scale has been going in the right direction the last few days have been rough.

Last week on vacation it was so easy because I was relaxed and in the sunshine, but being back in school and all the stress that comes with that is hard. The last two nights I've only gotten a combined 11 hours of sleep and its starting to take its toll. Hopefully tonight I will be able to get a good nights sleep. I've had so much homework the last few days that I now have a pain in my neck from spending so much time in from of my computer. Today was the last really crazy day of this week so hopefully it will get better.

On top of all of this, yesterday was very emotional. I've never been close with my father and its hard for me to accept that no matter what I do in order to work on our relationship he wants the end result without putting in the effort needed to get there. With wedding planning this comes up a lot and it makes me sad. I'm very torn on how I should walk down the aisle. My mom raised me and if anyone would "give me away" it would be her, but I know it would hurt my grandmother on my dads side to not have her son give me away. She is unaware of all the problems me and him have and so it would be difficult to explain to her why he wasn't walking me down the aisle. I thought maybe both my mom and day could walk me down the aisle, but with them being divorced for practically my entire life I feel like that will be awkward. I'm left thinking the only option is to walk myself down the aisle, but that seems lonely. What do you guys think? What would you do if you were me?

I didn't mean for this post to turn into a therapy session, but it must be what I needed. Even though yesterday was really hard for me I stayed on my meal plan and even went on an evening run since it is finally warm enough! Thanks for reading and being apart of my journey any help, wisdom or encouragement would mean the world to me!
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  • no profile photo CD15385276
    I am so exited for you and your fiancé! I remember the thrill of planning out a wedding and looking forward to spending the rest of your life with the one you love. I have been married for almost 5 years now. Looking back at my wedding day I wish I had stressed less and enjoy the day more. Planning a wedding always has its ups and downs but in the end its all worth it. I know that when family is somewhat divided it can make it difficult. But keep in mind that it Is YOUR day, enjoy it to the fullest!!! emoticon
    2249 days ago
    Do you have a brother or favorite uncle who can walk you down the aisle? It should be someone you are close to and not a stranger who calls himself your dad.
    2249 days ago
    Look into your heart and do what will make you happy and you feel is right. I would speak to your fiancé, too and explain your worries and concerns and ask for his opinion. It's your day. I hope you were able to rest and you are feeling a bit better about everything.
    2250 days ago
    I agree with what your previous commenters have written. Weddings nowadays are more about celebrating the day and life ahead. I'd say walking alone is out, b/c you said yourself that it would be lonely. I would go with both parents walking you down the aisle. It really is a way of giving a nod to tradition while recognizing the important role your mom has had all your years. Even your paternal grandmother could not object to that. The tradition of the father giving away the bride was traditional b/c the father was traditionally the head of the family and in his family's life while the mom had a back seat of honor. That's not true of today, so why should a wedding reflect what is not true? Having both parents to walk you and give you away will honor both of them for the roles, big or small, they have played in your life. Any adult can be mature enough to put any awkward feelings they may have toward another on the backburner for the sake of your special day.
    It will be a beautiful day. Just concentrate on LOVE and it will all fall into place. That's what this day is about anyway. No wedding is completely and absolutely perfect like our fantasy wedding, but if you focus on the love you have for your future husband it'll make the day a sweet memory for the rest of your life.
    2250 days ago
  • no profile photo CD11129519
    At the end of the day, this is YOUR day. Discuss it thoroughly with your Fiance and ensure that whatever you choose makes you happy and comfortable.
    Your Grandmother probably knows more than you give her credit for!
    Do you have a Brother that could walk you or a small Nephew?
    2250 days ago
    Both of them walk you down the aisle. I have seen it several times and it seems like a nice way to acknowledge the importance of mom. Life isn't perfect but you can make yourself happy by remembering this is YOUR day and everyone can behave for one day.
    2251 days ago
    Have you discussed your concerns with your fiance? This should be a joyous occasion for you both. If you want to have both your mom and dad walk you down the aisle, then do it! You have a right to stand up for how you want your joyous day to be! You don't have to be nasty, but be firm and clear that your parents and grandparents should understand to behave well and not like little children because they're not getting their way.

    I also understand the sleep issue. I've had insomnia my whole life and am trying to find ways to sleep. I also am starting classes tonight for degree number 3 (you can never learn too much, right?) emoticon And I'm in the process of trying to qualify for the Senior Olympics, so sleep is my number one priority.

    Good Luck with everything!
    2251 days ago
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