Saturday, February 21, 2015
I'm back again. I don't have any grand ideas of checking in daily, counting every calorie and joining ten groups for motivation and fun, since I know I can't possibly afford the time to do that. However, I need the idea in the back of my head that I am accountable to someone besides myself.
I have very gradually slid back into looking like I've stuffed a pillow under my shirt. Back, knee and ankle pain have become major issues again, and they had abated somewhat when I was thinner a year ago. That's what being sedentary most of my day does to me. I still eat real food, but exercise? What's THAT? (Sigh.)
These are my challenges: I manage a home care company and am working on a college degree at night. I have a small farm. I am renovating the downstairs of my house so my mother can move in. I am keeping all these things swirling around in my head, and am mostly calm and sane, but I don't feel like there is much room for anything else. The problem is, I have to make room, because some of the clients I serve are MY AGE! They are already dependent upon others to help them with activities of daily living. Very many of them are the same age as my husband. I can see myself slipping down that slope, and I have to stop it.
It's funny, because I just read my early blog entries, and I joined about this time of year, close to my anniversary with my husband. I married a guy who can EAT and completely lost my own sense of what I can get away with. I was already a hungry-all-the-time person, anyway, so I can't blame it all on him, even if he's a convenient target. ;)