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Feel like a hippo sat on me wearing ankle weights - carrying a giant bag of quarters.

Wednesday, January 07, 2015

Finally home from the hospital after a week's worth of (painful) IV treatment to bring some life back to my ailing feet.
This was Operation Save My Feet Round 2.

Two days into treatment my epidural became infected (again??), and the medication for my feet had to be shut off. Scary reminder that this exact thing happened in October, and I was sent home then.

If things weren't complicated enough, I had suddenly lost all feeling in my legs, and was informed that I could be dealing with a potential hematoma at the infection site. If I didn't regain feeling after a few hours then I would need emergency surgery. I had a headache the size of a Cadillac and my back hurrrrrt.
I prayed.

I smiled and assured my docs that I didn't have time for a hematoma to threaten my health, and I was confident all would work out. It did (thank you Lord!). After a few hours some feeling came back to my trunk area and legs.

One of my pain docs was practically giddy, and brought me some gluten free cupcakes the next day (oh my tooshy didn't need those...). She confessed that when she was paged about the hematoma threat, she sped to the hospital and stranded her car in front of the hospital (door open, car running), to race up to my room. Eeks!

We all felt that it was important to keep my treatment going, so I agreed to run those painful drugs without the benefit of the pain medication that ran through the epidural. I did my best to suck it up for the next 5 days. Pain was intense (yuck!).

This morning I can wiggle my little piggies just slightly. They don't have such a deathly pallor to them. This will hopefully keep me going for a little while. I am reminded that this was not supposed to rid me of my pain, and that's okay. One thing at a time baby.

I am so tired. Every sliver of me aches, even my eyelids and earlobes. How is that possible?

I was welcomed home with puppy kisses from Olive and furry cuddles from JitZu. Happy to be free from the heart monitor and unplugged from rowdy beeping machines. Thrilled to feel the cool ocean breeze from wide open windows in my home.

Thank you to Spark friends for keeping me going, and for the lovely distractions. You steered me away from feeling sorry for myself with spending my 2nd New Year's Eve in the cardiac wing of the hospital. Spark pals are 'awesome possum' as I like to say. What an awesome community!

Dunno know how long Operation Save My Feet will last. I will relish this toe-wiggling moment, and hopefully get back to microscopic bits of exercise and stretching soon! Gotta burn off those darn cupcakes :-)

'Nuff said.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • CATS_MEOW_0911
    Oh Bren, I hope things have improved a bit more. Thinking of you and sending you big hugs!
    1558 days ago
    You are such an inspiration. I don't know what God's plan is for you but I'm praying for you girl. Praying for saved feet and painfree days.
    1558 days ago
    Dang it you are one of the most amazing people I "know". I'm glad you're home and smooched your pillow. God is so good. Thank you for sharing yourself with all of us. I am always humbled by your freaking awesome character.
    1561 days ago
    1561 days ago
  • CANNIE50
    Hi sweetpea. I am glad you blogged. Reading your blog brought me back to SP after a one month absence, so thank you for that. I am glad the hematoma situation sorted itself out (nice job on the attitude, as always). So impressed that your pain doc is so invested in you, as she should be, of course. Forget the silly cupcakes, sweetpea - you burned them off burning through all that awful pain. Fighting pain is an endurance event if ever there was one. I love you but you know that. emoticon emoticon
    1561 days ago
    How is Olive just as cute sideways?!
    Wow, some of my other SP friends have mentioned visualization/thought shifting but you really nailed it with the hematoma. Once again, I'm bowing down to your badassness!
    I'm grateful for your SP friends, you deserve great friends to be with you. Sure, we all do, but I'm especially grateful for yours. And mine. And everyone else's. Sheesh, my gratitude is kind of rambly right now! Hee hee.
    Sending you and your piggies much love.
    1561 days ago
    Oh my goodness! My heart goes out to you .................. so I will definitely be praying for you .............. glad you can wiggle those pinkies .............. emoticon .....keep us posted ............... oh btw: hope it is ok to add as a friend; then I can follow how you are doing,
    1562 days ago
    Glad it didn't turn into a nightmare with that hematoma!! Your positive thinking scared it away & yay for foot movement!
    You've such a strong woman that I am in awe every time I read what you deal with everyday, so inspiring! keep it up girl!

    1562 days ago
    emoticon Praying for you, honey!
    1562 days ago
  • PHOENIX1949
    1562 days ago
    The amounts of pain you endure are really mind-blowing. Then considering the attitude with which you approach all of these insultingly injurious procedures, you are really the most amazing person I know. I only wish that could somehow earn you a pass on the pain for the rest of your life!

    I'm glad your piggies are wiggling! And that you're happily home now.
    1562 days ago
    Oh, my dear friend! You are in the battlefield! I am so sorry you
    Have to endure so much! You arectruly a warrior!
    I pray this gives you time and your feet will greatly improve!
    I love Olive & JitZu wonky pics! Adorable babies!
    Sending healing hugs and love.
    1562 days ago
    I love you so much. Sorry I've been so absent. Text me anytime 209-481-1947 or email mamadwarf@aol.com
    1562 days ago

    ...it always makes things better!
    1562 days ago
    emoticon emoticon emoticon I am so sorry for all that you have to deal with. I'm thinbking very good thoughts for you.
    1563 days ago
    oh Bren, I don't know why but I didn't know about your situation before reading this! Please forgive me for not paying for attention. Feet can be so painful. My ankles are almost shot. I don't want to fuse them though and that is generally what they do for destroyed ankle joints. But this is not about me....it is about you. I'm confused about the cardiac mention....what did you go to the hospital for and were the feet the main cause or did they go south because of some complication?

    Well anyway. I will be praying for you...as soon as I'm done typing this I'm going to put you on to my prayer list.
    God bless---and heal you!
    cyn emoticon
    1563 days ago
    Aww man! My pictures are all wonky... emoticon
    1563 days ago
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