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Change (or how children can possibly drive you mad) pt 1

Saturday, November 01, 2014

So...the kid went to her first Halloween party, invited by her good friend A, who just broke her ankle and is on crutches. She was ecstatic, and really happy to help her chug along, offering to hold her bag.

Things went well, she had fun, sprained her wrist (I think), thinking kids were going up a ramp ("they went so fast!!") instead of stairs. Came home glowing, with a LOT of reeeally good candy (every good parent checks emoticon ), got her iced, bandaged, ibuprofened and kissed. Lights out.


Ten minutes later she was crying in my room, telling me she wished she had just gone trick-or-treating with me, and she didn't know it was going to be THAT different.

Had a lesson on the phrase "The grass is greener on the other side", explained to her the previous glow, told her how change is hard, explained how it was hard for me to let her go, but it needed to be done. She wanted to go, I let her. Told her I thought she wanted to do both- grow, and let her mommy take her trick-or-treating. She agreed. Told her it wasn't happening.

She had a blast. There's no sense in crying.

For either of us.

But yeesh, it's hard! And I'm sure there are going to be a lot of other situations where this is going to be the case. And hopefully I'm not doing her wrong by showing her my side. That was just totally unexpected. And very, very ...real.

It would be cool to write that I didn't spend the 4 hours she was gone obsessing over this stuff. That I spent my Halloween at some crazy party, or with my husband, teaching him the perks of being married to SuperGirl.

But apparently, Halloween is Saturday night at MY house this year. lol.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    You are such an awesome mom! And did you get pics of you, girlfriend?
    2102 days ago
    Well done, momma!
    2102 days ago
    Such a great story. You captured one of those moments where they have a foot in each world and can't decide which way to fall! Life inexorably pulls them farther away from childhood...and it goes to darn fast. :)
    2103 days ago
    Ugh. My guys are 9. I just told them your story and said I am not looking forward to when they don't want to go trick-or-treating with me any more. They just hugged me and said "That will never happen Mommy!" They need a happy-sad face emoji.
    2104 days ago
    Keep her close now...they do grow up, as it was intended. Those special moments sink their roots deep in our hearts. Cherish each and every one. emoticon
    2104 days ago
    I hear you, sparky. It's hard when they start those tentative steps towards independence. Fortunately, you've still got a ways to go, but it is tough. At times I want mine to just grow up & get out on their own... but most of the time I want to hold them close and keep them near me. But, that would be a disservice to them... So we do what we know we are supposed to do. You did awesome & now you can make it up to your hubby tonight!!!
    2104 days ago
  • GHK1962
    Hmm. That was actually sort of ... nice. I mean yeah, it also seemed like it was one of those having to let the little bird fly kind of thing. But she came back and let you know she still wants to be there too. That was nice.

    You did good last night Dino Spark.
    2104 days ago
    Sweet story. I'm touched at how open your daughter is with you. You're BFFs. The two of you will do some fun mother/daughter time to make it up--maybe a grown-up thing. You're going to have so much fun watching her grow up into a woman (slowly of close---lol! you want to savor the good times!)
    2104 days ago
    Oh Sparky, so many things are changing aren't they? Heart strings are pulled, lessons are learned and life goes on and on. You have such a special relationship with your daughter and she is so lucky that you listen to her, you speak with her not at her, and you respect her feelings. She has no idea how fortunate she is. Sure...she loves her mom!! Sure....she sees great things about you. BUT......many, many kids are not as fortunate as your daughter. They are kids and the attitude of the parent is...shes just a kid, their feelings are often dismissed. Every stage at every age is the most important of a childs life. Every feeling is real and you sweet lady, acknowledge that. Great mom, great daughter! Thanks for sharing. emoticon
    2104 days ago
    This is such a bittersweet time, isn't it? You summed it up so well here--"she wanted to do both- grow, and let her mommy take her trick-or-treating." That's the teenage dilemma in a nutshell.

    I agree with DESERTDREAMERS. You are a good mother!
    2104 days ago
    You'z a good momma
    2104 days ago
    Yeah - those "growing pains" type of "teachable moments" - ouch! Couldn't have been easy for either one of you to have to deal with - but the bottom line was that all went well (despite the wrist issue)!
    2104 days ago
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