So it's come down to this...
Thursday, September 18, 2014
I don't know why I bother jumping on the scale anymore. All it does is glare back in big red numbers and tell me that I'm doing things wrong. As of five this morning I have officially reached my highest adult weight. I told myself I'd never be up there ever again, but here we are... and I don't know what's causing it. I'm not eating any more than normal, I'm not drinking soda, and my stress levels aren't any higher than usual... but here I am, steadily gaining weight.
I said something to the boyfriend last night and got the "you're fine as you are" talk. Again. In his opinion, I don't need to lose weight. I carefully explained to him that not only am I seriously unhappy with my size and weight but thanks to PCOS the extra weight will cause complications that will kill me, and that kind of ruins our plans for immortality, now doesn't it. He said that he'd support me whatever my choice, but it's going to be hard...
Seriously, though, I don't know what's causing this weight gain.
I texted with my former roommate last night who has admitted she too is in less-than-ideal shape and wants to get together for our usual walkies and even invited me along as her guest at her gym that she admitted she rarely goes to. I told her we need to return to being a kick in the ass for eachother.
Boy howdy do I need it.
So here I am, getting ready for work, trying not to cry and give up on today. Good times my friends, good times. *sigh*