80,000-99,999 SparkPoints 85,517

Here comes the rain again

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

And just call me "The Rainmaker" emoticon

We didn't actually "go to court" yesterday morning, it was more negotiation between our lawyers. Somehow the PEH found a decent one this time, instead of the incompetent he had for the divorce. I "won" 2 of the 3 main points, which is really just a reinforcement of the original custody order. I went for full legal custody as well but we will have to have an actual hearing for that in a few months. In any case, no more Ms. Nice Lady...back child support is going to be collected, along with future, for a good long time. Karma's a beeyotch, PEH.

Now that the immediate PEH stress is...not gone...but shifted into the next stage where I have a little breathing room the sun is starting to emerge from the literal & metaphorical rain clouds. Last blog I mentioned everything seemed to go wrong at once. Nothing too major thankfully, I am luckier than many, but enough little things were piling up that are resolving themselves.

My US house payment increased b/c of escrow but the rent couldn't increase to match..and then the renter gave notice she was moving out. My BIL's cancer returned with a vengeance and he passed away July 5. My cat became ill while I was in the US last month and had lost 8 lbs...half his body a 2-3 week period. Right before I came to the US last month the PEH ramped up his verbal abuse of my DD and DS (against DS for sticking up for his sister, DD b/c she is female and PEH is also a sexist/ racist bigot) and yanked her off the couch, force walked her into the kitchen and shoved her into the counter - twice - while getting right in her face, screaming obscenities. They didn't realize this warranted a 911 call for assault, they thought it only "counted" if she was hit. By the time the police were called on him too much time had passed and it was his word against theirs...and guess who authority figures are going to believe when there is no physical evidence?

In any case, a lot of his behavior over the past year has since been exposed to me, and the kids also told all of his family members they could reach. In response to DS ratting him out to the family the PEH kicked him out. DS was sleeping in his car when I arrived last month, he refused to appeal to the family again since they had all basically either defended PEH (calling the kids liars in effect if not actual words) or flatly said they didn't want to get involved.

So my "vacation" last month was busy with finding DS somewhere to live and making arrangements for him, taking care of DD's admin stuff that PEH wouldn't do (bank account, physical, getting her the moped & her license, taking her around to put in job apps), and starting the legal proceedings. Not very relaxing! Then retuning home to my sick cat and job stress and a month of rain!

Needless to say self-care slipped greatly!

But things are retuning closer to normal. The PEH is being taken care of. DS is moved in and managing things, and helping his sister as he can. Gandalf is recovering and has gained some weight back. Turtle (the cat), who was once timid like her namesake, has become a mighty serial killer of mice and birds (we are still working on the whole "you don't need to bring me presents" thing). I have a new renter moving in this weekend, with the rent increase to better cover my new payment. Several years of unpaid child support will now be collected, probably monthly instead of lump sum, I survived the Warrior Dash despite having not exercised for a few months now. And much of the company in France takes their vacations in August so I will be able to catch-up on a lot of work (I hope!), in addition to being able to re-start running.

So I say umbrella...who needs an umbrella? I'll be "singin' in the rain"!
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I am glad that things are turning around for you........ take some time to to breathe
    1423 days ago
    The thing about does bring out the rainbows! Hopefully you have a large, bright one! You deserve it!!! emoticon
    1425 days ago
    Yikes! You certainly haven't been lacking of stuff being thrown at you. Glad things have calmed down and your PEH is being held accountable for the crap he's been doing. Your poor kids have had a lot to deal with from their dad. I hope no more stuff will get thrown at you anytime soon. Hopefully you'll be able to start taking care of yourself better now.
    1425 days ago
    You are strong and you have a good positive attitude, and I'm glad to read that things are going somewhat better for you.
    I'm so sorry for the loss of your brother-in-law.
    Hope you can find more time to take care of yourself now!

    1426 days ago
  • LYNCHD05
    Wow, your life is sure not boring. I really am happy to hear that you have managed to get things calmed down and your PEH is being accountable for his actions. I feels foe the kids having someone like that to contend with. Thank goodness they have a sensible Mom!! Way to go for taking care of things!!!
    1426 days ago
    a whirl wind of things! glad some things got worked out. emoticon
    1426 days ago
    Wow - you have so much on your plate. Make sure you take a few minutes for yourself
    1426 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment

    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.