challenge assignment

Friday, June 13, 2014

An assignment...

Go back over your life and remember some of the painful incidents that made you want to lose weight. Why did you start eating and stop moving. What is in your mind now?

I didn' really have any desire to lose weight, never had an incident when my weight embarrassed me so much that I wanted to LOSE weight.

I weighed 103 in November of 1971 when I got married.
By a year after my second child was born, I was up to around 109, with the doctor saying 'gain a little weight' and my then hubby saying 'lose weight'.
I ditched the UDH (undear hubby) by kicking him out in '84 and then divorcing him. Got my life together. Moved back to my home state. And in November 1992 was hit bya large pick-up truck while stopped at a four-way stop (he never slowed down and sped into my lane despite my blaring horn).

THAT is when the weight came on.
I was not eating more in quantity; in fact, I was eating much less.

But WHAT I ate combined with how I was unable t move much at all for the next few years... Add to that an attack of divitriculitis that was followed by intense IBS problems that lasted from March '93 til finally easing up in around '97. I ate pasta 'flavored' with chicken broth; mashed potatoes, plain!' and crackers. And something I didn't even like: coca cola. Between 11/20/92 and 3/3/93 I gained (gulp) just over 60 pounds from that sort of eating plus going from highly active lifestyle to struggling to try to figure out how to get out of bed or a chair. Yup, the pounds added up. Over the next few years from 3/93 until about 1996 I'd added another 30 pounds to my weight.

I've lost 40 pounds since 2007, but it's far from enough.

How do I feel NOW?
I don't care about anything but FEELING good. That is my goal... and losing weight will help me move more freely, feel better. It's a real struggle because though I eat the right foods, I usually don't eat enough or eat too late in the day (eating when I remember to do so!) and still am not active.

I will lose weight.
Because I want to enjoy that feeling one gets when she walks.
It's a really neat feeling in the gut, like when I used to play tennis and run for a difficult shot then slam a hard fast shot back low to the net.... and walk head high and proud.
Doesn't matter how you look. It's about how you FEEL.
And that's what's in my mind now:
I'm going for the feeling.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Thank you for sharing your story. I agree feeling good is my everyday goal.
    1461 days ago
    I have IBS too as do a lot of people with Fibromyalgia. I forgot to add that to my blog on this challenge yesterday (my pity party). I've had IBS for 15 or 20 years probably but as I was going through all that stress it ratcheted up. I had 3 months of debilitating bowel problems and one of my main concerns was trying to keep something on my stomach so I wasn't in so much pain. You tend not to worry about how much weight you will gain when you're in so much misery.


    1467 days ago
    Great suggestion - going back over my history is helpful - it gives me both incentives and also reminders of what DID work and what didn't to get healthier. It has been a long journey and I am still learning. Thanks for the suggestion - I will look back and take time to write about the reasons and the solutions both past and present.
    1467 days ago
    Sam, the reason I am so stressed and am not successful
    with losing weight is because I can't let go of the terrible
    taunts from my ex. He always told me I was 'fat' and my
    step-mother drummed it in to me when I was growing up.
    When i lose 5 kilos, it seems I am scared of keeping it off.

    I try so hard, but I seem to fear something like looking
    good - can't explain it. Twisted reasoning. I go great guns
    and then sabotage myself. I have to get my ex out of my
    head but can't seem to. Even to the point of believing
    that I am not good enough. I know I have to try harder.
    any tips? How did you let go of the baggage? emoticon
    1467 days ago
  • ZELDA13
    As much as I would like to look better, my main goal is also to try and get healthier. it is a strong motivator. I also want to be able to walk all day if I choose and feel good about myself. I'll be happy with any improvement and won't stop until I am there. And I'll be rooting for you,
    1467 days ago
    I, too, remember the feeling of getting those challenging shots on the court. I had to give up tennis, running and horseback riding in 1978, spent a year in a body brace and have been up and down ever since. I now focus on what I can do today, not yesterday, not tomorrow. Some days I can do a lot. Some days I can do very little. Still, I feel so blessed to be able to do something most days. And, when I can't, I remember that there have been other such times and I recovered to do more again. I would love to lose a few more pounds, but I feel pretty good right now so am not pushing very hard these days. I still enjoy watching others play sports I can now only watch - French Open, US Open Golf, Olympic races and gymnastics, etc. It brings joy to remember. I wish you great success!
    1467 days ago
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