Nervous and scared
Tuesday, June 10, 2014
So, my title says it all.
I am nervous I am off the wagon because yesterday I had a honey bun and ice cream. Once I allow the massive sweets overload in, I have a EXTREMELY hard time kicking it again I am trying to not let it derail me and chalk it up to a bad day but I have been craving sweets for days now... After cake Sunday, honey bun, ice cream and a bagel yesterday and half a bagel today. I cannot start over again... I have come too far.
I am nervous for the wedding... Its less than two months away and I am having MOH drama. She says she cant come one minute and yes the next. She doesn't talk to me for days and then complains I don't have time for her. I make a point to talk about her, not the wedding and she doesn't want to. I am lost.
I am scared the wedding will not be fun... We are getting married in Vegas. Short and sweet ceremony, unlimited boozes and food for a reception and a party bus after, fully stocked to wish us a farewell good bye. I am so concerned it will not be fun. I am concerned the families are going to mess this up for us. I am a bit of a control freak and am having troubles controlling this 1200 miles away!
I am mostly scare of being a wife. My mom divorced when I was a young girl and never remarried. My Fiancés' family was the same. What is a wife? I know I love this man unconditionally and would walk through fire for him. Is that enough? I supported him through career changes after leaving a job he had been at over 14 years... I've supported him for the last six and a half years through everything. Is that enough?
I'm nervous and scared!