A break from the Soul Searcher series
Monday, June 02, 2014
I needed to give my brain a bit of a rest and just 'talk'; no Soul Searcher questions today.
I had a beautiful weekend and I hope everyone reading this had the same blessing. I got to see one of my kids, both grandkids and some dear friends. I got a lot of gardening done, as well. It was, in my opinion, the PERFECT weather to do just about anything and everything (except ice skate - which I don't do anyway)
My Mom passed away just this past May 6th and I'm trying to sort out a lot of emotions. My mother and I did not get along with each other. My siblings have been sifting through her 'belongings' at my parents house (both parents are in Heaven and my mother was pretty much a hoarder) and I'll be going there shortly to go through some drawers and closets and think about my childhood and the relationship I had with my parents. I wept for months (years) when my Dad passed away; couldn't shed a tear at my Mom's funeral. Please don't send me a message reminding me how we ALL love our Moms or that ALL Moms are a gift from God. They (we) might be Moms but are still human and have their/our flaws.
I'll always be grateful to my Mother for the well performed mechanics of being a mother and for the lessons she taught me on what not to do................. and how to be a good Mom to my kids by not being like her.
I admit, this may sound horrible to some of you. Perhaps, unfortunately, some of you can understand where I'm coming from. Please don't judge me; I became a Mother to myself years ago and, I'm told, that's a pretty big and awesome thing. I'm proud of myself but sad that my mother didn't have a chance to see what a wonderful person - and mother - I've been. I do have faith that she's in Heaven and has a front row seat to what I do with my kids and grandkids every day.
Sorry, this did turn out to be a Soul Searcher topic
Thanks for the opportunity to emote a bit. Here's to more beautiful weather!