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Am I an obnoxious exerciser?

Friday, May 16, 2014

Today, in the Dear Abby column, there was a discussion about doing one's floor exercises while visiting at relatives:

DEAR ABBY: When my husband and I go to visit my mother (in another
city) every other month or so, my brother and his wife insist on coming
over to see us while we're there. Our visits usually last two or three

Many times when they come over, my sister-in-law will start doing her
exercise routine, including floor exercises, which are, in my husband's
and my opinion, unbecoming and inappropriate to do in front of other

How do we deal with this? Are we crazy to feel awkward when she's lying
on her back doing these pelvic thrusts? Would it be out of line to ask
her not to do this in the future?

My brother says, "She won't listen to me, so it wouldn't do any good to
talk to her," so we know talking to her won't help. What do you

DEAR FEELING AWKWARD: Here's how I'd handle it. Talk to her anyway, and
ask her to please refrain from doing these exercises in your presence
because it makes you uncomfortable. But if that doesn't work and she
starts "performing," stand up and say, "Hey, folks. Let's go out for a
walk (or coffee, or a sandwich)," and put an end to her bid for
attention that way.

(End of Quote)

Well, I remember visiting my inlaws years ago and the stress of trying to lipread the in-laws conversation (especially when they switched to the local "Red River" dialect!), with poor lighting and horribly uncomfortable couches and chairs that were too long in seat depth for my short little legs, and sometimes emotionally charged conversations, where I would move off the chairs and do some gentle stretching type exercises (being mindful that my clothing covered up all the girly parts.). Was I so bad??

I remember thinking, while reading this letter, what was the rest of the story? Was the Mom's house so small that sister-in-law couldn't do her exercises in another room? Was the Mom so paranoid and distrustful of the "in-law" that she would not allow SIL to leave the room (which was the case in my situation. My mother-in-law had situations with the other two daughter-in-laws supposedly snooping through her stuff.). So a person in a situation like I was in might be wanting to do exercises and having no other place to do them but in the same room. Of course, we can all spin out dozens of other "what if" scenerios. But somehow I felt like Abby's response was a little short.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I think it would be best to find another room to do the exercises, and if that is not possible then find a form of exercise that would not bother others, like going for a walk.

    Since women are no longer chattle, I don't think it is the husband's responsibility to bring his wife in line. She is an adult, and it is up to her to decide what form of conduct she will have. But, hopefully she will take others feelings into consideration.
    1492 days ago
  • LINDA!
    I agree that there must be a guest bedroom, if they are staying over, where she could go to exercise in private. If they are visiting from in town, there is no way she needs to do this at their home. I find it inappropriate to do these exercises in front of another man. I do think it is to get attention. Shame on her husband for not being able to explain to her that this may be an embarrassing situation to all involved.
    1493 days ago
    I agree--more of the story was unsaid
    1493 days ago
    Well, the way I read this... the Dear Abby sil lived locally and so why didn't she do her exercises at home either before or after the visit to the MIL while her husband's brother & wife were visiting.

    I guess I rather envy those who do not mind exercising alone in front of an audience.. I don't mind exercising in a group, but not real keen on having an audience.
    1493 days ago

    Comment edited on: 5/16/2014 2:32:50 PM
  • SOMAR12570
    I feel that SIL should have asked to do her workout someplace else or do an exercise that wouldn't offend others.

    1494 days ago
    I do that too! So, from my perspective, as long as you are modest, it's a-ok. Pelvic thrusting type thingies . . . ummm . . . maybe not so much.


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    1494 days ago
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