On the last 20 days, I travelled quite a bit: Niagara- on-the-lake (ON), Columbus and Dayton (OH), Saint-Augustine (FL) and Easter weekend in Quebec City at my sister's place and spending some time with my daughter Emma.
I am always to spend a few days with my family - it is very important for me and I miss them a lot… however, spending time with them made me reflect on my own flaws! And it allows me appreciate better what I have.
First, I realized many things about myself during my visit to Florida…
1) I don't like the cold weather and winter is hard on me - I need to go away and I am very fortunate to be able to affords trips and to be task (as I am in the military) to go to different places too.
2) Running is hard - very hard and I often feel like quitting... (just read my recent blogs!) but I don't because I set goals and I want to reach it. Running is my escape and my anti-depressant! I started running because I wanted to do exercise with my hubby - now that he can't run (he needs a hip replacement), we plan my shorter gym time together or my cross training. Since I joined Spark - I got inspired by people who push themselves to go beyond their limits and this has become a huge source of motivation for me.
3) I am preparing for the Canadian Armed Forces Running Championships at the end of May. I have been selected to run the marathon. I am even more proud of the fact that I do this without a training team & I don't have a coach/trainer. I run alone, as a result I have to plan my route so I can grab some water/bar on my way (I usually don't carry anything on me - not even music). A big factor is also safety. It was nice to run that 30k under the sun and to have my step father (my coach for the day!!!) meeting me along the way - He drop me off at my starting point and then we both left (he was biking so he took off and we had agreed to meet at 10k "markers"). I remember how important it was for me to have some sort of support during the marathon last November. After 14 miles, I was doing a countdown to my meeting points (16 and 20 miles)... I was looking forward meeting him and getting my supply! I also revisited my goal - I am not in it for the competition - sure I want to do well I am very competitive - but my initial goal was to complete a marathon - DONE November 2013 and qualify for the Nationals - DONE. So my goal is to run it with a decent time and enjoy a nice weekend with my Mom, my sister and my daughter whom are all travelling to Ottawa to support me. That will be a big victory to say that I completed a marathon for the Canadian Forces and maybe qualify again for Boston 2015 (I met the timings last race…).
4) What I do speaks louder than what I say... I mean for my 16 and 18 yo daughters, whatever I say is often dismissed (at first anyway!) and what I do leads them. I don't remember what my mom used to say to me but I remember how it was to be with her as a teenager... So I want to make it positive. I was happy to come back and I think my Maggie (16) was happy to see me back too. I am trying not to tell her what to do (of course she knows my expectations about school and helping around the house) ... and it makes me proud when she decide to sign up for soccer at her school ... and she got her brown belt in akido - two sports I would not practice myself but I support any activities she wants to try, as long as she commits to it!
Coming back home… I was very thankful for my life… Especially for my hubby.
It is very stressful to go back to work… I will try for the next few days to focus on the positive aspect of my job and feeling good about what I get done instead of looking at my incomplete to-do list with disappointment. Even if my board is not "all done" I still get a lot resolved! I have to manage expectations, starting with my own.
Finally, my time spent at my sister's place is like a must - I don’t have many friends and sharing with my sister is a necessity! Going "home" is an occasion to tie with traditions… if not defining who I am, it helps shaping who I want to be. We always talk about the past and think about the future.
We renew what we have done for as long as I can remember…
(Home-made sugar bush party!)
Went for walks and made a few stop at our favorite local merchants (bought fine food to enjoy later)
We talked about our projects...
...sharing good meals (no tracking and I need to get back on track!)
I didn't do my 20 miles run but I ran a half-marathon instead: 1h37min55sec. I am ok with that! I am sure I will get some inspiration from the Boston marathon today - hoping to be part of it next year... Now it is time to hit the road - 10 hours drive to go back home.
Will get back to my sparkfriends later (I was busy with family - had limited time as you can see)- Thanks for all the Easter wishes, your support is always a source of inspiration and motivation.