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In Three Years

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Three years ago today was the first day of the rest of my life. I’m in awe of how time has flown and how quickly things change. Despite the weight gain, I’ve worked hard and am so much healthier than I was then. I saved my own life (along with my liver) and am grateful that my doctor back then scared me thin or at least thinner than I have ever been. I thought about writing a long drawn out blog talking about my journey, but you know what? I'd rather not. I'd rather let my journey speak for itself and even though I’m in a dark place right now I can’t knock my efforts. I’ve worked hard, cried hard and did the best I could. The weight gain is only temporary; eventually, I’ll be able to get it off and will feel more like myself again. Things will get better in time and I’ll bounce back. I have no doubt of this.

2003, Show: Dorothy and The Wizard of Oz, Role: Glinda the Good, Age: 17

2007, Show: Beauty and The Beast, Role: Mrs. Potts, Age: 21

January 2011, Show: Godspell, Role: Joanne, Age: 25, Weight: 286 - This was the year that I decided to do something about my weight. I couldn't do half that I wanted to do on stage, and my weight was slowing me down.

I wanted to be stronger, fitter. I wanted to continue to be successful. I wanted to continue to thrive. I still do. I may not be where I want to be right now, but I'd rather be here than where I was two years ago.

Summer 2011, Show: Once on This Island, Role: Mama Euralie, Age:25 - I had lost around 45lbs at this point.

January 2012, Show: Hairspray, Role: Motormouth Maybelle, Age: 26 - I had lost around 65lbs or so here.

I’ve been lucky enough to work consistently in the theatre and there isn’t a moment I take for granted. Theatre is my passion and I will be doing it until I physically cannot anymore.

February 2012, Show: The Color Purple, Role: Jarene (Church Lady), Age: 26 - 70lbs or so.

Fall 2012, Ovation Awards Ceremony, Role: Winner of Musical of the Year Award - 90lbs or so. I felt so beautiful on this night and every time I think about it, it makes me smile.

Spring 2013, Show: In The Next Room, Role: Elizabeth - 100lbs Lost, Age: 27

Summer 2013, Show: RENT, Role: Seasons of Love solist; Age: 27 - 10lb or so gain

February 2014, Show: bare a pop opera, Role: Sister Chantelle; Age: 27, Weight: 239 (a 54lb gain)

My name is MissB8604 and I...

emoticon I suffer from Depression
emoticon I am a singer
emoticon I am an actor
emoticon I am a daughter
emoticon I am a fiancée
emoticon I am a step-mother
emoticon I am a cat lady
emoticon I am an avid book reader
emoticon I am a history nerd
emoticon I make mistakes
emoticon I love Disney
emoticon I am a Official SparkPeople Success Story
emoticon I am an Official SparkPeople Motivator
emoticon I was Featured In The Huffington Post for my Weight Loss
emoticon I ran/walked my First 5k in 2013, Second in 2014
emoticon I did gain 50lbs back from 100lbs lost
emoticon I am HUMAN
emoticon I am and will always be victorious

This list is just a fraction of the person I am despite the weight gain. I can do this, I will do this. I've come so far and have so much life ahead of me. This is only a setback and I will not let my depression win.

Here's to more years of good health and a good life.

My 2014 Bible Verse:
Mark 5:36 "Don't be afraid, just believe."

My Weight Loss Bible Verse: Romans 8: 7 "I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us."

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Viva la SPARK & Cheers to LIFE! :-)

    1676 days ago
    I wish I could give you a hug. I wish the smile you wore on the night of the Ovations Awards was always on your face. I wish you believed in you like we believe in you. You are a blessing. You are someone else's answer. Your ability to be transparent is helping someone else. When I was at my rockbottom in life, I was reminded that our personal struggles aren't always for us. Sometimes we experience hell so that when we triumph, our story can bless someone else. Just know that you can get through this and you need to get through this not only for your sake, but for the sake of that stranger who has no more hope and needs to see someone else overcome.

    Much love.
    1678 days ago
    Your awesome !! No matter what weight you are. !! Just know your beautiful and so talented !!! Hugs. !!
    1679 days ago
    1679 days ago
  • SUGAR0814
    emoticon When you are ready to do it AGAIN, you will! emoticon emoticon
    1679 days ago
    And you are a SPARKER!

    Hugs. You are awesome. You are beautiful. You are strong!
    1679 days ago
    This was so great! I loved walking down memory lane with you. Thanks for always inspiring me. P.S. Love the show "Bare" and sister Chantelle, I got the part of the mother once
    1679 days ago
    I'm so glad you have been able to look at your journey and realize the strengths that you've gained from it. I think the list of who you are, as a whole person above and beyond your body and weight, will serve you well as you struggle through the dark times. It's easy to simply focus on all that isn't going right and look wistfully backward (I am constantly wishing for do-overs and saying "If only I'd done things differently) - you're ability to look at your present and know better times are coming is inspirational to me.

    1679 days ago
  • no profile photo LOFLLAMA
    You are a wonderful girl!
    1679 days ago
    I want to see one of your shows!! I'm a singer too, on the weekends lol.
    You look like you are an amazing performer, I think you said you live near Hollywood?? If so let me know any future shows you're in I might wanna come see :D
    That gain is temporary, your body is just trying to figure out what weight it should be. You'll take that weight off again in no time. Sometimes you have to tell your body it needs to be lighter. My weight always wants to stay at 150 and not go down further. Every time I get towards a healthy weight it gains back to 150 again. argh
    but you will do it I know it!! like ilovemali said YOU ARE AMAZING
    1679 days ago
    And you are amazing.
    1680 days ago
    you forgot to add

    emoticon I am emoticon

    you are to us emoticon
    1680 days ago
    You made me cry... You are beautiful, your story is beautiful, and even more than that, your STRENGTH is beautiful! You are amazing Miss B, and I"m better for knowing you. Love ya girl.
    1680 days ago
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