Trying to Stay On Track

Friday, April 11, 2014

Its after 8 at night, and we are finally able to get some dinner. We have been over trying to help our son. His mental health problems are out of balance again and my husband and I are trying to be supportive - without enabling him. All we got accomplished to night was to bring him some dinner, clean clothes and tried to talk him into getting more mental health help. He is Bipolar (among other things), and not in a receptive frame of mind.

Thursday his case manager took him to the hospital because he had sprained his ankle and had missed his appointments. He was given a script for pain meds but was unable to get it filled and went right to bed. 11:30 at night he called me because he was in so much pain he could not sleep and would not wait until morning. I drove across town, found an all night pharmacy, and took him home. By the time I got home it was after 2 am and I could not go right back to sleep. Normally, I would get up at 4 am, go for my walk, eat breakfast and take care of my grandson. I could not get my butt out of bed. I thought about taking a walk in the afternoon, but its already 95 degrees and I don't do well in the heat.

Here is where my goals, plans, and resolutions normally fall by the way side. I am an emotional eater, and when my son does not stay on his meds, it causes so many problems in every area of his life - and since we are his support system in ours as well.

Since I don't drink, my way of coping is to calm myself with food. Then I feel bad and the whole cycle starts a new. I am well aware of how poor this coping system is. So, we will get up in the morning and walk. Our late dinner was not greasy high calorie take out food, it was good healthy fruit, veggies and left over lamb burgers. We will take this one day at a time, because it can and has gotten really bad with my son. I can not change him, but I also cannot allow him to drag us down with him. New day tomorrow, I will make the most of it. I will try not waste this night worrying about what I can't change.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I am sorry you son is having health issues and the fact they effect you and your healthy. you have two hard trails to travel am praying that the rocks are soon off both trail. Way to go not turning to food for comfort. keep us up to date on how things are going.
    1831 days ago
    My best friend was bipolar. It is really hard, especially for parents. Wish you all the best and lots of strength. emoticon
    1831 days ago
    I have been in your shoes so many times in the past with my son that is also bi-polar. Such a horrendous medical issue and so hard to keep under control. During those times that they are "manic" or depressed and totally out of control it's all we can do to put just one foot in front of the other. Try not to beat yourself up over it. It's great that your choices were good ones regarding your meal, that is huge, especially when you were under the stress you were. Today is a new day....know you will continue to make good choices and the best choice for you. So hard when your a Mom to deal with a child that is ill..... I think you did fantastic under the circumstances.....there are days that just putting the cookie back that you grabbed is HUGE! Hugs.....if you need to chat I'm here.
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    1832 days ago
    Thanks for sharing! Sending you lots hugs today!
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    1832 days ago
    Having children alone is a rough road. A parents job is never done. But add emotional issues on top of that and the roller coaster feels like it will never stop. I understand the needs and strains of a child with emotional issues. I am not a religious person myself and it about broke me during some the roughest times with my daughter but I kept reciting the Serenity Prayer and it helped some. Your health is number one and a little a time, no guilt for being human, forgiving yourself and belief in yourself. You have got this. emoticon
    1832 days ago
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