There Once Was a Girl, Who Had a Little Curl...
Friday, April 11, 2014
...right in the middle of her forehead.
And when she was good
she was very very good.
But when she was bad
she was HORRID.
That sticks with me, this nursery rhyme I learned when I was a child.
It reminds me of ME. I am both very very good and HORRID, mostly now swinging from very very good in one week to HORRID the next. Very very good = tracking and staying within calorie range by eating a healthy variety of foods and getting in the proper exercise and losing weight to HORRID = not enough water, freggies are something foreign, sleeping very little because I stay up to watch TV in order to drown out too many thoughts, tracking intake has no place in my world, and exercise is only the forced walk of the pooch.
This week I went to HORRID and jumped off the healthy wagon again and into the muck to feed my anxiety with crap. At least now I can more clearly see when I am jumping off and hitting the dirt. So here's my approach this time around.
I have written down everything that is making me anxious, which really just centers on many personal and work activities and emotions that are on my calendar, so to speak. So I took a nearly daily approach to write down these events and how I will approach the planning for and execution of such events. I have a few more details to write down to finish my list with as clear a vision as I have right now.
I have two more major items to add to this two-month outlook:
1) A menu.
2) An exercise plan.
Adding a menu means adding a weekly dinner menu along with a grocery list and a plan for when to prepare the food. Beyond that, I'm going to add the kind of menu where I map out what I am going to eat for each meal and snack nearly every day so I can stick to that plan and not let my emotions and anxiety raid the cabinets.
The HORRID in me chickened out with my weigh-in this week (as seen on the right side of my home page). No point in seeing a failure on the scale when I know what I did to myself this week.
All of you have been so wonderful in offering advice for how to deal with anxious eating. And 68Anne told me to re-read my last blog when I am feeling a bit "off" just to remind me that I can recoup and do the right thing. So I thank you for all you do to support me and remind me that I can be successful. Thanks again for your support and ideas and advice. You all are AWESOME!
AndreaG89 (aka Jeckyll & Hyde????)