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Devastated

Friday, March 21, 2014

Rebecca's MRI was yesterday. I will quote the Meyers for the results:

:::The MRI showed a mass behind Rebecca’s left eye that wasn’t there on the previous MRI. The doctors at CCF are communicating with the doctors at CHOP, who will determine what they can do.

We may be headed to Philadelphia this weekend, if they tell us they can remove the tumor. If they can’t remove it, given the tumor’s growth rate, Rebecca will likely live anywhere from a few more weeks to months, but nothing is impossible and studies are always being opened.

That is literally as much as we know right now. We are staying in a holding pattern until we get a decision from CHOP, and must ask you to do the same. Please don’t call or text the house or our cell phones. Comments here are fine, but we really can’t handle a flood of calls right now.

If we haven’t contacted or don’t contact you directly, please don’t take it personally. There are a lot of things we have to deal with right now, Rebecca’s sorrow and fear primary among them. We haven’t told her that she might die soon, because we don’t know that ourselves, but we have told her the bad rocks are back and that she might have more surgery and radiation treatments.

To which she said: “I hate that dumb ol’ rock and I want it to be gone!” And then curled up in our arms and wept.:::

I've been sitting here for five minutes, trying to figure out something to say that doesn't sound self-centered or self-indulgent. Right now I feel like I've been hollowed out and then smashed flat.
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