FEAR is something I never expected!
Monday, March 10, 2014
Not in a million years. Now let me explain.
In November I started having severe pain in my hip. It was effecting my workouts and getting progressively worse. So I went to my primary care physician and he sent me to a specialist.
But sometimes ignorance is bliss!! I had e-rays taken and met with the orthopedic specialist. He looked at the x-ray and asked me if it (the hip) was worth saving. Saving???? Was he really saying what I thought he was. The shock must have shown in my face. Then I saw the x-ray. My hip looked like Swiss cheese to say the least. But his attitude didn't help. It went back and forth. First he says that it should be replaced within 18 months, then he says that some of his patients go on for years with bone-on-bone.
Now the fear part comes in. Not about surgery-that part doesn't really bother me. I have talked with others who have had replacements done. Nope, not surgery. Would you believe it's exercise? Yeah exercise. Walking for more than 15 minutes is about all I can do. And no more recumbent bike-the angle for the joints is even worse. Elliptical and stationary bike are ok.
But there is always that little voice in my head keeps reminding me that it IS going to hurt when I stop moving. FEAR of pain is always in my thoughts. No matter how many times I tell myself that that I can handle it (I did have 2 kids after all) there fear is still there. A friend said that I was am only temporarily disabled. DISABLED - not! My epilepsy is a disability. At this point in time, the pain is almost constant and some days are worse than others.
Now to figure out an exercise workout that won't aggravate my hip until surgery (if and when I decide to do this). Now I need to figure out how to stop the fear.