The Road to Recovery

Friday, February 07, 2014

Step One: Find a job

Step Two: Rebuild emergency fund and establish financial goals

Step Three: Lose excess weight, build muscle and achieve desirable level of fitness

Step Four: When finances allow, seek out counseling to heal emotional/mental wounds

Step Five: Be awesome at life.

Well, step one. Check. I got a job, and I'll start my training on the 11th. It's a temp to hire position, but it seems very similar to my last job and that lasted two years. I am feeling so very confident, albeit a tad nervous, about going into this. Not only is having a decent paying job a HUGE relief for me, but it's actually a job I think I could be good at and I feel way more comfortable going in this time.

I will outshine them all and prove that I deserve to be there, because I think I do. After all I've been through, I deserve a break. I deserve a chance to have a job, and not just do well, but exceed at it. I deserve to have my finances in order and working for me. I deserve to have the things I want, because I will have worked for them. I deserve to be debt free and working towards my goals. I deserve to have a happy, healthy body. I deserve to overcome my past and have a better, brighter future.

I still have a lot to face. There is still an army of skeletons in my closet, but I am ready now. I have taken the first step toward my independence, and I am ready to take on whatever lies ahead. My family is now aware of my struggles and I have them to support me. My boyfriend has always, and will still, tried to support me. But I know now that I have to make things happen for myself. I can't rely on anyone to do it for me. I have my Samwise Gamgee but the burden of the Ring is mine. He might carry me from time to time, but he cannot carry it for me. At the end, I have to be the one standing on precipice making the decision to put it all in the fire. This is my life and I'm going to take charge of it now.
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    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.