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Through the years...

Wednesday, January 01, 2014

I don't know how I managed NOT to do my year end reflections or New Resolutions and that's okay. I think in my mind, I wanted to move forward.

This past year was quite the blur actually as I'm sure this year will be. Somehow in it I got lost .. I don't know. I always had my eye on the prize but never the "umph" to do anything to get there. I recently skimmed a blog about "plateaus or self sabotage" and think for the most part that's what I've been doing. Just hangin' on to the 170s but not really doing anything major or uncomforatble to get out of it.

Hence emoticon , again.

Strangely I'm not upset about it. Mind you there is the quips about "as long as you never give up" etc etc and yes, that's a part of it. I just feel like.....well, like the time I quit smoking. I must have quit ten times before I just ...quit. Same feeling today. I want to make and keep this streak...I want to honestly say in December of next year "I did it!!" and not "well, I tried, sort of"

Perhaps it's the New Year Hype and you know what? That's okay too. That just simply means there are more people aware of it this month. I just have to remember to HANG ON TO IT as the hype dies down.

In a nutshell: Reflections. Since joining Spark in 2009 I have lost 30 pounds. I went from obese to overweight........and have held there.

In 2009 I had quit smoking, moved to California, was having troubles with the hub and struggling to like me. I felt (and still do) like I was the biggest one in the room. When I received my stem cell and cataract removal ... to see me in the mirror was NOT what I had implanted in the brain for the previous ten years of non-sightedness. It was heartbreaking and I knew I had to do something about it.

November 2009

By 2010 I had lost ten pounds...It was slow going and I was attempting a run with enormous amounts of shin splints, but I kept going. I didn't think I'd see a different but my face proved me wrong...I still didn't like what I was seeing and kept pressing. My weight fluctuated greatly in 2010 as I struggled with the post smoking, entering college weights.

April 2010

July 2010

In 2011 I was really struggling at home but made it a point to start taking care of me and the girls. I think it began paying off.

November 2011

December 2011

In 2012 & 2013, I kept pressing but "life" started getting in the way. I was learning to like myself more and perhaps this began the "plateau or self sabotage" method of just maintaining my overweight status. That's not to say I haven't been active or eating badly. I just haven't pushed myself out of my comfort zone.

December 2012

June 2013

October 2013

My goal for 2014 is quite simple. It's not just "losing weight" or "getting into shape". It's more of a grey area I think. I want to be strong. I want to LOOK strong and continue loving myself. I want to press forward with what I've accomplished and as I've mentioned before I want to actually say "I did it"

So, in SIMPLEST terms I will finish the C25 (that' I've said I'd do since 2009)
I WILL finish Slim Series &
I WILL workout daily for at least one hour. That's right, not 10 minutes or 20. I'm beyond this or I should be.

I want to prepare for the princess run at Disneyland...actually next years resolutions should include a run a month. I think I attempted that last year.

There's going to be a lot of life in the way obstacles. My oldest moving to K.C., my Kate and her trips to Universities, my youngest in cheer, and hubs with this business. I get that. I will have to work WITH that, not around that.

Anyhow, enough rambling. Thank you Sparkies for hanging with me the past few years, through all the blogs, the loss of the dogs, the separations and reuniting of family. All my stories of the girls and the ups and downs of this weight journey. Thank you for always inspiring and believing.

You are what keep me going through the years.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • CANDOK1260
    emoticon emoticon pic
    1596 days ago
    I totally get what you are saying about working AROUND other people! I have to do that all the time too. It's something we have to come to grips with. I've been working on it and learning all the time. I enjoyed your photos and blog. You have had a busy life!

    emoticon emoticon
    1597 days ago
    you go girl! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1597 days ago
    emoticon and this time, you will!
    1597 days ago
    I love you and I know that you are mentally in a great place. I know that we have this going on for us this year and while I may not post on here all the time you will see my drive and motivation on my FB fan page. We CAN and WILL do this....I know we said that last year was our year, but honestly I really feel that this is the year for us!
    1598 days ago
    good luck! you can do it! i feel if i have a plan and focus on it i can be successful for the whole year. it's all about planning and dedication. also about picking yourself up and trying again. not giving up because you messed up once. just stay focused and keep going! i myself am a huge self-saboteur. once i realized that i was able to begin the journey (which i'm still working on) to fix it. to realize what i was doing to myself so i could recognize it before it took over and ruined my success.
    1598 days ago
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1598 days ago
    I know you will do this--you have so much strength to draw on! Best wishes for 2014!
    1599 days ago
    Love the walk through of the pics, you have done so well! The weight loss really shows!

    Happy New Year!
    1599 days ago
    You are adorable! Have a joyful and healthy new year! Hugs, Laurel emoticon
    1599 days ago
    2014 is going to be our year! You are going to be Spectacular!!!
    1599 days ago
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