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the eve

Tuesday, December 31, 2013

So, as of right now, My issues with the bank are resolved, hopefully. Got to keep a close watch over the next week and make sure nothing else goes wrong.
Seriously as soon as I get thru the first week of the year and all my bills are taken out and paid, I am going to switch banks and never deal with these people again.
So, here we are, on the eve.....of a new year.
I have no big plans for a send off to 2013. But I will send it off in some way. and be so happy to see it gone. All my plan is, maybe to cook a healthy dinner and watch the walking dead and stay inside with the honey and the new puppy. and just relax, no loud parties, no alcohol, no deep fried chunks of cheese. Just happiness to have warm house shoes on my feet and a cold bottle of water in my hand. and maybe a late evening walk, its supposed to warm in the 50s today.
I am so hoping this one goes better for me than the last one.
I know its kinda goofy to feel that way about a date, I have never been superstitious or religious, but the number 13 in this past year has brought with it, for me, alot of bad mojo.
Alot of wrong, it was a year ago today, I had been hit full in the face with the total betrayal of a friend I thought I would always have.
It took me up thru the month of April to find out all the details of the back stabbing, I never fully knew, and still dont today why they chose the path they took.
But I am just glad to put it behind me.
It took me along time to realize it was their shortcoming in character, nothing I had done.
Well choosing to be friends and confine in and trust the wrong people I guess, that lesson learned.
So today, I sit here, looking out over the horizon of this new year and for the first time in a long time I have faith and confidence that I can make this year better.
Getting the bank situation lined out before the end of the year has given me new hope.
Maybe just maybe, going into the new year will be an easing in. No big bangs of pain and loss, no big knives to the back or the gut.
And what I look forward to most, is finding myself again, Not the person others made me into this past year, but the person I was in 2012.
The woman determined to live cleaner, less alcohol, less food, more exercise, more insight into who I want to be and how I want to live.
I will take no crap off of anyone this year.
I will not be put down, or dragged down by others who have a bad intention.
I will fully accept my shortcomings and losses and deal with them head on, not sit back and cry and wait for the fall out.
And what else can I do???
Workout, walk, eat healthy, live clean, stay away from alcohol and drama and just live.
That is all I have for today.
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    emoticon You have the strength and will power to accomplish almost anything you choose.
    1633 days ago
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