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I Need Help With Emotional Eating

Monday, December 16, 2013

I need help.

I have a big problem with emotional eating.

I don't want to feel - it is not safe.

Would any of you be able to direct me to resources that might help me learn to deal with this? Possible resources might include a Spark team, blogs, Success Stories, being a Spark Friend, how to meditate, how to live in the present.

I like to exercise and love to run - but as the saying goes, All the Exercise in the World Doesn't Make Up for a Crappy Diet.

I have been eating eating eating and watching TV. I've become aware again of a lifelong familiar pattern of thinking that I call, "Things will get better when....".

The current whens center on my husband getting a job, us getting regular medical insurance again. And more minorly when my mother finishes outpatient cardiac rehab - supposedly at the end of the month - which means I won't have to run her there 3x a week in addition to everything else that is draining, weighing on me.

I am dreading my DD coming home from her first semester at college for a couple of reasons - she's been having GI issues of some sort that the school health services haven't yet been able to figure out. She's lost 15# that she didn't need to lose. And we only have catastrophic insurance and not enough money to cover everyday bills. And the huger issue is that 12/24 is the anniversary of the death of her friend Jen Sebena, murdered by Jen's husband who was not in his right mind due to PTSD. Jillian participated in the "Remember Jen" activities - and she went to every court date to support Ben and his family - even in the face of the disapproval of the Jen's fellow police officers. This story was THE news in the Milwaukee area as Jen was a police officer, murdered on the job, and Jen and Ben had been mentors of a church youth group. Jillian (DD) will want and need me be to be there for her - to get the medical help she needs, to help her deal with the stress of her dad's longterm unemployment and to deal with the anniversary of her friend's death.

In real life, I am a loner and lonely. People seem to like me well enough, don't mind having me around, but don't seek me out or include me. This includes family. I am not active on any Spark Teams at the moment. I feel invisible OL and IRL. I want to write write write - but am afraid I'd be whining, doing the poor me thing, and turn y'all off. It seems like I get more response to race reports than to some of my more emotional blogs. There's that whining, poor me attitude sneaking in. I am a caretaker - but struggle to take care of myself. I know I can sometimes do big, difficult things. I followed a training schedule, gathered resources and successfully, relatively comfortably, with smiles, ran/walked my first marathon fall. I need to apply that confidence, skills and focus to dealing with emotional eating, with feeling. SparkPeople Community, please help me, please direct me to some resources on dealing with emotional eating.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Oh Mary, you have so much on your plate! I am so sorry to hear about DD and her friend's tragedy. You seem to be the glue that holds it all together. Forgive yourself for using food to comfort you and just focus on one meal at a time. You are a great person! You can do this!!
    1584 days ago
  • CHERYLA2012
    Of course you fall back on Emotional Eating because it's a comforting, familiar thing. And it does "seem" to temporarily "pacify" you as you stuff your feelings down inside you with food instead of expressing them. Then, when you are satiated, and cannot eat any more, there is guilt and remorse, and other feelings that come to the surface as the negative chorus in your head starts up and the whole cycle repeats itself.

    Your blog and you can write whatever you darn well want to write. The responses, well that's trickier because I think some people aren't quite sure what to say so they say nothing.

    I have spent a lot of time on SP researching, and practicing coping skills and mechanisms so I can live with being an Emotional Eater. I do not think it will ever go away, but I can do my best when it rears it's head to deal with it quickly.

    I wish you peace, my SparkFriend.

    1585 days ago
    emoticon emoticon
    I can relate to the invisible thing, but am not an emotional eater so will let others respond who know the issues.
    You have a lot going on, and no wonder you're trying to cope in the way that you think works. I'm here for you whether it's about loneliness or running.
    1585 days ago
    I have dealt with emotional eating since I was a teen. All the books, journals, support groups- They just didn't do anything. I had to go to therapy with a psychologist trained to deal with emotional eating to be able to get it "under control".

    It's not really under control, though. I learned other methods to deal with stress, and I still have a slips (like last night, eating 20 ginger cookies because I am nervous about my board exams). I am obviously still a work in progress. I am still learning coping skills, and I still have to have my psychologist for help.

    I know asking for help is tough. Believe me, it took years and years and a hundred failed attempts before I realized that I needed it. But if emotional eating is a problem for you, you need someone trained to help you learn to deal.

    Good luck.
    1585 days ago

    Sounds like you're having a rough time. I'm sorry. Asking for help is perfectly acceptable, and it makes you a stronger person to know you can't always do it alone.

    There is a stress busting (official) Spark challenge here:

    Since it looks like your emotional eating revolves around stresses in your life, this might be beneficial to you.

    I also wish comfort for Jillian; losing a friend is never easy.
    1585 days ago
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