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I was able to beat the snow. Thank Goodness.

Monday, December 09, 2013

Sunday night the Acupuncturists wife called and asked if we wanted to drive to Waterville 25 miles away from here on Monday morning. I knew we were expecting snow later in the morning but I still said YES PLEASE.

I was awake off and on, mostly because of our son's situation with his DW in the hospital and it is not going well. She had asked for pain pills and one nurse was just not being nice to my DDIL. on several occasions so needless to say DIL had to speak up. That brought a Dr to her bedside and there is a problem and now she has to go to back and do the procedure again tonight or tomorrow morning.

DH and I took off early today to go to my appointment and when I got back home it was just beginning to snow heavy in our area. We had not been in long when DDIL called and she told us this was going to happen. She sounded beside herself. Yesterday she was told she could go home but this new development means she will be staying in the hospital much longer.

Our grand kids and our son have to go to an out of town Dr today after work it was arranged that way so DIL is alone. This is not going well.
She always has their house decorated for Christmas she feels she has things to do and the stress level is just not good.
She was dreading the next surgery after the Holidays but now it is imminent she is so very upset. I was talking with her and I just wished I could hug her. She and I are in a place far away from family and just like myself I did almost everything with just our own family while DH worked very long hours. I know just how it is to be in that situation and I know that is what is disturbing my sleep, I should be able to help but I can not.

I send people cards just because they send them to us, happily they are all done.
I wish I could go to her but I know it is out of the question. I cannot talk to DH about this because it will just upset him because he can not drive for long in the snow. So here I am telling my Spark friends my thoughts.
There is no point calling over seas to my family we have rarely been back home and my family has never even seen her or our grand kids. It is written and I am reluctant to send it but I know I will have responses coming back to me so I will send it. When I get encouragement from my spark friends I will be able to think through what I need to say to our son and the grands. They will be out of town for a couple of hours and I feel sure our son has not even thought about eating or picking up medications for the grands. I sure wish I could get to them to pick up the slack but the weather alone is a Major deterrent from Maine to Upstate New York is simply out of the question with the weather outside..

My computer has a letter missing I hope spell check will add it for me. It is the first letter in the word --question --0uestion-- so we will see if spell check can help me out here. NO that does not help at all.

I found the word question elsewhere and cut and pasted it in . At least my brain is working.
Thanks it is time for me to make supper so my mind will have something easier to think about. Thanks Spark friends, Pat in Maine. emoticon
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I remember one Christmas when my parents were having a hard time. The car had broken down and money was short. Mom said there would be no tree because there was no way to get one and no money to buy one. There was a local group that had trees for sale about a mile from our house. My brother and I got into our piggy banks and went there. It was only a few days until Christmas so the trees were pretty picked over and on sale, but we got one and carried it home. Sometimes adversity brings out the best in kids and Christmases to remember. I will always remember that scraggly tree. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.
    1655 days ago
    I hope things can look up for everyone. Hugs to all of you.
    1655 days ago
  • PICKIE98
    Priorities are not decorations.. Perhaps the kids will look back and remember this Christmas as the one that they realized just how much their mom does for them and the household.

    Remember, there are two whole weeks until Christmas eve,, however ill these kids are that they are unable to decorate or help dad, maybe they will feel better soon. Prayer is the biggest gift anybody can give them when they are far away.
    We can provide that for you and them.

    remember, everything happens at a specific time FOR A REASON...

    1655 days ago

    I am sorry to hear about your DIL's illness and know you feel bad that you can't be there to help out. Your son and children will be fine and things will get done as they have time. Yes, you have to take care of your eye so just hang in there and send prayers and talk to them on the phone, send them messages.

    We had a dusting of snow last evening temp's have risen to the mid 30'sF. I am hunkered down for the duration, well stocked with food. This is a good day for a pot of chicken soup. The chicken is cooked and in the freezer so the soup won't take long to make. emoticon

    Brenda in Chehalis, WA
    1655 days ago
  • TERRI289
    Hoping today finds you in an easier state of mind..

    emoticon emoticon
    1655 days ago
    Stay Safe you two....YOur son & DIL & Grandkids will work things out. I think DIL is getting help from you just being able to call you and use you as a sounding board~~maybe so she does not have to voice her fears & worries to your son?

    So in a different way...YOU are helping Pat~

    emoticon emoticon
    1655 days ago
    Remember you can only do so much. Do what you can, when you can and when you can't be there or do anything about the situation you just have to turn it over to others and pray about it. My thoughts are with you. This too shall pass. emoticon
    1655 days ago

    Sorry to hear of your DDIL's illness. The weather has certainly been rough the last week or so and driving through the mountains is not a good idea in this weather. Try to keep in touch as best you can. You might consider whether taking a bus (assuming one goes that way) would work for you to get there. You wouldn't have to do the driving, but could still get there to help.

    Otherwise just offer support as best you can and know that they surely have friends who will offer some support to them.

    Take care and get some rest. Once you are able to travel you want to be healthy yourself in order to help out when you can.

    Cathy emoticon
    1655 days ago
    1655 days ago
    so worrying for you having family sick & not being able to help out as much visited Plattsburgh once many years ago went by bus from NY. Please do not stress over not being able to help out as you want to pray it all works out
    1655 days ago
  • RD03875
    I must have missed what you said was wrong with your DDIL but I hope things get better for her. Have you thought about looking into flying there? Maybe you can talk to a travel agent or AAA to see how you can get there. Maybe the snow will stop soon and clear up so you can get there.
    1655 days ago
    Pat, my heart goes out to you. It is so awful when you can't help especially those you love. I am praying for her and I will include the family. Stay strong. HUGS, Terry
    1656 days ago
    Sorry to hear of your daughter-in-law going through all this. I know it is stressful for you to be away from your family at times like this. Our closest child & her family are still 5 hours away by car and over the mountains, so I understand.
    1656 days ago
    emoticon to hear the news of ddil hope she picks up after the next procedure and is home soon emoticon
    1656 days ago
    I am so sorry your son and DDIL are going through all this. Especially sorry that a care giver would not treat your DDIL nicely. Glad your son spoke up! I hope this person was counseled!

    ((((HUGS)))) It's hard when you are helpless. Just havg in there.

    HUGS & prayers.
    1656 days ago
    These things happen sometimes. Just be there for your DIL on the phone.
    Your son and grandchildren should be fine. they are growing up. Your son can put up decorations in place of her. Ifen if she came home she would not be able to decorate. I will say a prayer for your DIL.
    1656 days ago
    I'm glad that you got to the acupuncturist.

    Please try not to worry. I know that you want to help your son, DIL, and grandkids but sometimes it just isn't possible. You did a good job of raising your children and they will be okay.

    I'm 70 miles from Ian and have to depend that he will take care of himself the best he can. I won't always be around and can't always help him. He may not do things the way I have but he chose to move away for economic reasons, like your children did. He lost his support when he did but that it is part of life. We often lose something to gain something else.

    If things get really bad I would hope that your children would move back to Maine so that you can help them. We have told Ian that if he needs us we are here and he can always move back home if he needs to and I'm sure your children know they can as well. emoticon
    1656 days ago
    Sure do hope life gets better for you.
    1656 days ago
    Pat, honey, do what you can do and turn the rest over to God or whatever religion you believe in. Continue to offer love & support through prayer, cards or calls, whatever you feel comfortable doing. We will always listen. emoticon TC
    1656 days ago
    This is a very difficult situation for you, I know. There is no way you can get to your DDIL or your son so you just have to accept that for now. You need to keep in touch with them and see if there is anything you can do from where you are. Plus, you need to be careful of your eye. Let them know you love them and will do what you can. They understand. they love you. They don't want to put you in jeopardy. emoticon
    1656 days ago
    Pat, this weather is terrible and there is no way you and DH should be on the road. I'm trying to figure out how to get up to see mom and dad. This time of year is not easy. So sorry that things have not gone well for her. With the holidays here that has to make it even more stressful for everyone. Are there any friends nearby that could give them a hand?

    Thinking of you and your family and sending extra hugs and prayers.

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1656 days ago
    You know you cannot go to your daughter in law right now so try not to stress over it. I know that is easier said than done but we don't you making yourself ill over something you have no control over. emoticon

    I'm glad you are home safely from your own appointment.

    1656 days ago
    Try not to stress yourself, Pat. Much as you would like to help, there's no way you can get there. If they have lived there for a while, perhaps there is a neighbour who can help, or some kind of social service agency they can call on. visiting nurses or home care?

    Glad you were able to get home from your appointment before the snow started today. Driving in the winter is no fun.

    Take care, and try to rest,
    Hugs, Gail emoticon
    1656 days ago

    Comment edited on: 12/9/2013 6:54:00 PM
    1656 days ago
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