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Trick or Treat?

Thursday, October 17, 2013

I was reading some posts the other day on what some thought of Trick or Treating. The grand topic of conversation was how they don't pass out candy to anyone looking older than 12. They feel that is wrong and by principle alone..they weren't going to do it again this year as well.


The age of 10 was a difficult time period for me. I had a child's mind and attitude, but my body betrayed me. I was tall for my age...5'4 and still am that height today. Mind you, I feel it is a perfect height for me today, but not at age ten. I also developed as well. I was horrified. I use to hunch my shoulders inward to hide my chest and to make it appear I was shorter than I was.

Halloween for us was a fun time. The focus was more on dressing up and going out with my brother and friends. It wasn't so much about the candy for our mother would pool our loot into a bowl and put it on the top shelf in the cupboard and we would have a treat here and there. Many times when Halloween rolled around once again....we still had candy in that bowl from the precious year.

I was so excited when I was ten. I was so proud of my costume. I put a lot of thought into it. I was a Viking and it was homemade. I had a bowl on top of my head for a helmet. My father made horns sticking out of it. I had a brown towels as a shirt and a lamp dangling chains as a necklace. I blackened out my teeth and had a shield and wood axe over my shoulder. I was COOL.

One of the very first houses we went too....was an old lady. She refused to give me candy because I was TOO OLD. Said so.

I was taken aback and hurt and so confused as I told her I was TEN. She told me I was a lair and passed my plastic pumpkin up and gave my 8 year old brother double the amount.

I wanted to cry.

I wanted to go home.

My brother told me to forget her.......we shared our candy anyways.

I didn't care about the candy. My feelings were so hurt. I was crushed and just wanted to cry.

That was my last year I went trick or treating.

I still think Halloween is fun. I do.

I treat those that show up at my door with respect. I ooh and aww over their costumes. I want them to have fun. I don't care if they are teenagers or not. I would rather have a high schooler come to my door for candy than to get into mischief.

Those cute tots that have no teeth and the parents are carrying you truly think that they are going to eat that candy? I care? ...nope.

People just want to have fun.

Every year.....I think of that old lady that hurt my feelings. I would like to say that as an adult....I am over it.........I the sense....I understand the source. What I have not forgotten was how I felt that night.

So......when giving out candy....please...rethink about your convictions...your principles of ONLY giving out candy to WHOM you think is under 12.

I leave you with this thought....

Life is really too short for such strong convictions.............

and yet...a life time of everlasting hurt for others.




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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    2656 days ago
    Mary, how sad that someone would be so cruel to a child. I know it happens everyday, but I just can't even imagine. I have had very few trick or treaters over the past few years, but as long as they come to my door and are polite I don't care how old they are, they will receive a treat. As Heather said, even the parents will get a treat. After all that is the object of the day. Go out, have a good time and show off your costume.
    2657 days ago
    I remember a year and my next door neighbor and I made costumes to dress as Russian cossacks. We spent a lot of time and were very creative, but we didn't get any recognition because we were dresses as evil Russians, even though pre-Communist Russians. Funny what we remember. Like you, the candy wasn't the issue, just recognition for a costume well done, not store bought. But it was a long time ago. Those people are probably dead or in nursing homes by now.
    2658 days ago
    I'm still not 5'4". emoticon I always wanted to be tall. Sorry you were treated unfairly. That stinks. emoticon
    2659 days ago
    Mary I read this to my daughter Jennifer. she said to tell y ou she knows how you feel.
    She went to a house and the lady gave everyone candy and she put a rock in her bag and told her she was too old.
    2659 days ago
  • MARYBETH4884
    Many thanks from another former tall and developed ten year old! That can be such a hard time!
    2659 days ago
  • MALAMI518
    I am so sorry that you had that experience. It hurt me to read your story.

    In our neighborhood we still have high schoolers out trick or treating, and I'm all for it. I happily give candy to anyone who comes to my door that night. I'd rather they be out collecting candy than out causing trouble. I prefer that they look like they at least attempted a costume, but even if they aren't in costume, I hand out the candy with a smile. And those teenagers are often much more polite than some of the younger ones.

    So here it's a big TREAT!

    2659 days ago
    Oh my emoticon
    2659 days ago
    Sharon is SO right Mary...
    Things that happen to us when we were young...shape is into who we are today.... works in your case...
    Sometimes could have ended up like a witch like that old lady so many years ago! emoticon

    But because you are a positive person...YOU took the POSITIVE road!
    emoticon YOU!!
    2659 days ago

    Comment edited on: 10/17/2013 4:15:55 PM
    Agreed! My 11y/o is 5'6, he has a soft heart and is easily hurt... size is no indication of age, but I can tell you he is often the mature one in those situations!
    2659 days ago
    I truly feel like I know you through your blogs and today I hurt for the child you were that was so emotionally scared by that comment so many years ago. You can say you're over it and I truly believe you are but it's those things that shape us into who we are today. I love that you see the fun in Halloween and put no age limit on giving out candy. My granddaughter took her younger siblings when she was 16. She had fun with a costume and even bought colored contacts for her special night with her brothers. I am so glad she went and had fun. And yes, she got lots of candy!
    2659 days ago
  • PGHP31CK
    If you come to my door on Halloween, you get a treat. I don't care how old you are! Sending someone away empty-handed is poor hospitality. We've even given goodies to the moms and dads who are toting toddlers for themselves AND the toddlers!

    And, HOLDINGMYOWN, one year we DID run out of candy! Yes, my DH & I ransacked the kitchen to make sure no one walked away without a treat.

    I vote for TREATS!!!
    2659 days ago
    Oh Mary that had to be such a hard Halloween for you. We don't get any trick or treaters where we live as we are just too far out in the country. I do miss seeig the little ones they are so much fun to watch even some of the older ones too.
    2659 days ago
    Wow Mary sorry to know you went through that. I agree it is better to give teenagers candy then having them making problems.
    2659 days ago
    Awww....Mary~~ What a really sad thing to haqve happened to you! I think you met up with a real WITCH when you were ten! emoticon

    I am ON YOUR SIDE when it comes to Halloween and passing out treats..ANYONE who comes to my door gets a treat! I have had Moms & Dads dressed up in costumes because they need to help the baby or under 5's up the steps...SO even THEY get a treat at my door! If Mom or Dad is not carrying a treat pot or bag...I give extra to the little one and say..NOW that was for MOM! or for Dad!

    And when it comes to teenagers at my door? They are the most fun for me! I can here them coming in groups...giggling and laughing up my steps...
    When I open the door...they are still giggling and laughing and trying to look scary & trying to get out a *serious* TRICK ORTREAT!!

    Here where I live we have French & English speaking Trick ot Treaters...I speak some French but because I am English I always speak English first when I open the door...
    These teenagers have proved to be polite over and over again...Even though they speak French only ..they say MERI...THANK YOU!

    And the teenagers costumes are great...I have pictures of some where you can see where they did so much work to make them...and they LOVE to be told what a great costume they have on....

    Alex thinks I am the BIGGEST ( no pun intended...LOL ) KID on Halloween!

    I think if a trick or treater came to my door after I ran out of treats...I would raid my cupboards rather than send them away empty handed!

    2659 days ago
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