12. To be able to teach my children how to live healthy lives, so they never have to go through this

Thursday, October 17, 2013

Ah this one is SO important for me! I don't have any kids at the moment, but definitely hope to have a few in the (near) future. I would never solely blame my parents for my weight issues, because as an adult I should be able to make the changes necessary. However, I don't think they gave me the best start in life in terms of how to live a healthy life. Firstly, I don't think there was ever one single occasion in my childhood where my parents 'exercised'. Sure, when our car broke down we'd have to walk up to the station to catch the train, or walk to the bus stop. But proper exercise? Nah, forget it, not my parents. Both my parents are overweight (not anywhere near obese, but they could both do with losing a few pounds or twenty) so I guess they didn’t think it was that necessary. The first time I ever encountered a proper gym was when I was 17 and a friend from school told me about it. How crazy is that!? (The first time my mum ever stepped foot into a gym was about 2 years when I took her!)

At school I was really into sports, so I played a lot of netball, I used to run the 100m and relay, got involved in football (briefly), rounders, whatever was around and whatever I discovered I was good at. You would therefore think I may have been pretty slim? Not a chance, because my eating was atrocious. My mum did, and still does to this day, fill a house with snacks and treats. Every evening she could easily munch her way through three-quarters of a victoria sponge, or a packet of hobnobs. To give her her dues, she did mostly give us home-cooked dinners (unless she was feeling lazy and would get us a KFC or something), but those weren’t particular healthy in terms of what I know now: African food is carb-central! To top that all off, my parents were crazy tight with giving us pocket money (meaning we got 0 pounds and 0 pence, whilst our friends were getting £5-10 a week), which for us meant that all our friends could afford to get treats from the corner shop after school and we had to be deprived. So any time we managed to scrounge a couple of pounds, we'd spend it all straight away on junk food. Which I then started hoarding and hiding in my bedroom and eating when my parents weren’t around, in fear that we'd never get a chance to find another pound if they knew!

So what was my point? I'm SO glad I've been on this journey because I have learnt SO much. And everything I have learnt I WILL pass on to my kids and ensure they live as healthy a life as possible from DAY ONE. I never want them to feel conscious of their weight. I never want them to experience the struggles I have and the low self-esteem I've felt due to my weight. I want them to know what it feels like to run around and play and eat delicious nutritious food and for that to be their norm. I want to teach them about moderation. I want them to enjoy being in the kitchen with Mummy and learning amazing new recipes. I want them to be playing on the swings and slide in the park whilst I run laps, and for them to want to run with me for a few laps too. I just want them to know what healthy is and what healthy does and to live that life and be happy.

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    I just found you and was reading this blog that you posted some time ago... it is a good blog- about dreams and foundations. I had a Mom who went the other way- she and my daughter are the thin ones- she gave me plenty of good information about exercise and good eating- which I was able to pass to my daughter, but I was unable to use it myself. My Mom gave it to me with a large dose of criticism and a bit of competitiveness. She was always the one who could eat less calories and exercise a bit better, and I was always just unable to complete it well. That has changed.. I am slowly trying to make good choices for me and not compete- if we have a weight problem, no matter what foundation we have been given- we have to make it a message for ourselves and find a way to bring this information into our lives without becoming so frustrated. One day at a time, one good choice at a time...
    1570 days ago
    You know I understand where you are coming from. Blessings to you and much love. You are so beautiful. Love
    2229 days ago
    good luck

    2255 days ago
  • no profile photo CD4274730
    This is so true.

    As I was reading this, I was thinking about a SP friend of mine here who is baking her own artisan bread, making all kinds of different, amazing, creative recipes, gardens, runs, etc...she doesn't have kids yet, but she's going to be one of those "super moms". That's who I want to be, too! I dream of the day I can have some little helpers in the kitchen and how amazing it will be to teach my kids such great habits. We grew up pretty healthy, but I still hoarded because a) we didn't get an allowance either and b) my father taunted me daily so I ate in secret. Anyway...this was a great blog, thank you!
    2475 days ago
    I LOVE your last paragraph, great incentive, and summary of what you want for your kids-and what every mom and to be mom should desire! emoticon This is a big one for me too and a HUGE motivation for me. Being I'm a RECE (registered Early Childhood Educator) it means a lot. First, that I have a good influence on the children I care for to lead a good example health wise! Secondly, to my nieces & nephews, whom I adore, I really want them to see this, especially as they (esp the girls) are growing older. My oldest niece has always asked questions about the area of being fat, etc. already at age 5! (she's super slim and was never chubby, of course a little baby chub as a toddler, but good stuff :) Anyways, I so desire to lead a healthy example. About 3/4 year ago she asked me, "Aunt ---, you're not fat right?" (I was almost at my all time high!) :( And lastly, for if/when I hopefully can have *my* own children! I want them to experience food the way its mean to: be noursihing & healthy, and not go through the addictive, frustating, and codepence attachment with food struggle! I want them to experience healthly you described above....Great blog! emoticon
    2583 days ago
    This is so true! I feel exactly the same way. emoticon
    2595 days ago
    Amen!! emoticon
    2596 days ago
    So true! I will be a good role model for my kids or nieces and nephews in the future!
    2596 days ago
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