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Sept?? Oct?? Where did the time go??

Friday, October 04, 2013

Well, approaching assesment time, in every way.

In the last month, did a visit to see my mom everyday, took her out a few times, had major (and I mean MAJOR blow up with the local nurse ratchet, I probably mentioned that.) About 10 days ago as we are approaching the end of the Medicare 100 days allowable, I said I would be looking at taking her home (with a goal of at least another 60 day at home so we could requalify for Medicare 100 day in a skilled facility if she needed it. I'm sure it was oddly coincidental that the very next morning Nurse Ratchet called to say they thought my mom had had stroke and were sending her to hospital. Whatever event happened didn't show on CT-mini stroke, no doubt- but her language center is allllllll kinds of messed up. She an clearly say most words but not put them together in a sentence. Often times I can read her mind and guess....other time I just have to tell her I don't know what she is saying and is it important? Usually not. She can still walk , but after returning to 'home' from hospital I took her out for dinner and she promptly fell and banged her head again. Sigh.

In any event, tomorrow they come to do a home assesment, she is getting out Sunday and coming to my home to try and make it here. We've ordered all manner of equipment, bed and chair pressue alarms, hsopital bed , etc.

On one hand I feel like I will be less stressed to have her here and have control of her meds and such again.(After her stroke they took her OFF all B.p. meds!! How much sense does that make??!?!?) And I have researched various other holistic things that may help, along with anti inflammatory diet info. I keep telling myself I WILL have time to start exercising , etc., once she is home, napping etc. September was hit or miss and October is a bust so far.

To complicate matters on my roughest days I gave into my carb addiction. Pasta, bread, cheese...etc..That said, I do have plans and foods to possibily do a juice fast sometime soon. (See Hulu.com; Fat ,, Sick and Nearly dead" documentary).

While I am worried about how to handle my mom with limited language ability, I think I would be more worried leaving her in a 'rehab where she cant tell me what is happening.

Hope to get centered soon and do a weigh in and face facts. Gotta get up in 3 hours to get ready for deliveries and home assesment visitors, etc. but wide awake of course.
My main stress upon having my mom here is WHAT TO FEED HER!! She likes old school stuff and we eat vegetarian/vegan....and I am a lousy cook. She may need to learn to adapt, be better for her in teh long run.

Thanks for the shoulder to lean on kids! Angora sounds like you know first hand what is in store.

Moxie, kiddo.....dare I ask how sis is? My frail sis is failing an havng more procedures and I think of you and what you are dealing with. hugs

Thank you all for the supportive words and suggestions!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I am so proud of you. You have thought this through, and are doing the best you can. You recognize the pitfalls, and are going into this knowing there will be issues that will need addressed. You have done an amazing job.

    There are always compromises to be made. Perhaps mom can eat with you more familiar looking meals, and can have a Lean Cuisine type prepackaged meat meal once in a while when you have more untraditional meals?

    My husband eats no carbs, my son loves them. We make vegetable lasagna with long strips of zucchini instead of noodles, then the usual cheese, tomato and spice layers (just make sure to use tomato paste instead of sauce with the zucchini, which already has moisture.) It looks like 'normal' food, so it works OK. Same with chili, which is made with zucchini grated or cubed instead of beans, still looks and tastes like chili. Other days we have foods that do NOT look familiar to son, like quiche, with unusual veggies like okra and fennel. He does not like that, so I will make him something special just for him that day, maybe mac and cheese or pierogies, that DH never eats. That way, everyone gets fed with minimal fuss.

    So, I try to make non-traditional foods in a traditional manner, which makes them more 'acceptable', and keep some special pre-packaged 'traditional' foods on hand, to fill the gap.

    Lack of sleep and stress really sends cortisol soaring, one of the side effects is an extreme carb craving. It is no wonder that stressful times cause carb eating binges. It is a chemical thing, not just lack of willpower. Perhaps you can arrange to drop or scale down some activities (like the holiday preparations) so allow more time for adequate rest. For me, trying to keep up with all the previous activities plus caregiving was just too much to handle. Either something had to give, or I was in trouble. It was hard to choose to scale back, but it helped reduce stress.

    You're doing great. Hang in there.

    1965 days ago
    Your mother is extremely lucky to have such a dedicated and loving daughter. Its mentally and physical draining to be the main caretaker. I know, I am trying to advocate and steer through a mental health system that is poorly funded, poorly run and deal with health care personnel that are only steps away from being as mentally ill as my son. I wish you strength and hope you take time to take care of yourself as well.

    1967 days ago
    emoticon Glad you are able to bring your mom to your home. I think like you as hard as it will be it will be easier knowing she is getting great care and you can try non-traditional things to help her heal and be as strong as she can be. Praying you have the strength and energy to take care of your mom and find time for you in the mix. Caregiving is a full time job and hard work but the pay in the end is worth it. You will always know you gave your mama the best.
    1967 days ago
    Hay Girl...been thinking of you too! My sister is determined to live while the cancer slowly removes more and more of her. I've been going back and forth taking video's of my mom for her. My sister can't speak and my mom doesn't text. It's the only thing I could think of to fulfill her dying wish to see our mother. My mom is doing better, she knows that she is dying and accepts that. For a while there, my mom wanted to die before my sister, but she understands that would hurt my sister even more. My brother is doing better..for awhile, he looked like death warned over. I had surgery and had two tumors removed the size of a water bottle....no cancer thank u Lord! Somehow, I exercise every day no matter what the obstacle in my way, and I seem to have one hurdle after another...it seems there is chaos breaking out everywhere. But, both my daughters are fine now...but there are problems there, too....I could go on all day! But, I smile, turn it over to God and move on. Have you tried a picture poster for your mom? She can point to glass of water, toilet, food, bed...even a question mark for something important. Try feeding her mashed potatoes and meatloaf with lots of shredded veggies cooked into it. She probably wouldn't know its not beef. Stay clear of rice. Make sure your mom is hydrated..***Hugs* my friend. Somehow we will make it though this. Sorry about your sister. emoticon emoticon
    1967 days ago
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    1967 days ago
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