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Friends? Are you sure they are really your friends?

Monday, September 30, 2013

I went out last Friday with my friends and one of them asked how my workouts are going (Note: these friends aren't really into exercising). So, I said you know I finished Insanity despite all my wounds --my wound on my palm, elbow and bumps here and there. This other friend said why do you do those things anyway. And I said because my stomach is getting big and I have events to go to. I want to look good.

Then they said you know you just have to accept that at our age, it will be harder and harder. So we just have to accept that our bodies grow as we age. Then this friend says, oh you just want to be ARM CANDY for your husband. So, what if I want to look good at events I need to attend.

Then, I told my kids and my husband. They said, what friends! My husband said their way of thinking is exactly why people are overweight. Just accepting without any action.

It is a good thing I have friends in Spark who push me to work at it. I guess my last ranting and this one makes me work more just to show them, see!

I will work harder than ever! I got so irritated with their comments. This is actually the first time I heard of negative stuff about working out. I guess some people say stuff without really thinking. I just felt bad to hear this from my friends.

I'll show them!!!!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I think your friends are abit jealous especially if you look better than they do and I bet you do. You're right; it's these kind of thinking that has our society overweight like it is today. I get these comments too. People would tell me that it makes no sense working out so much like I do because I will just put the weight back on. Their reason being since everyone on my mother's side of the family is big/overweight then I am made to be overweight, I don't believe that and that's why I will keep on keeping on.
    1647 days ago
  • SKATER787
    I think that's a typical attitude in the society. It takes more work to overcome that. Good job.
    1664 days ago
    Yes weight loss and everything we are trying to do to get healthier is harder as you get older. BUT that doesn't mean we shouldn't try!! Those don't sound like very good friends if all they think is you are trying to be arm candy. I would spend less time with those friends and more time with those who at least respect what you are trying to do for yourself even if they aren't actively trying to get healthy.

    1665 days ago
  • JOURNEY1986
    "Friends" sure can be toxic! And it sucks - it's extra hurtful because it comes from them. I know a lot of people have already said, "they just feel self guilt for not taking care of themselves" or they are making excuses for themselves and putting you down to feel better about themselves - and while I think that's all true - it does still suck to hear it. And then to be in the position of not wanting to be hurtful back to them, but wanting to stick up for yourself.

    You. Are. Awesome. They don't understand why you want to be healthy or what your goals are, and that's their problem. While they start having to deal with health issues because of their poor attitude's towards being healthy, they will most likely come around with their thinking. Of course then they will probably play the "poor me" card, but hey - you'll be healthy and active, which is much better then unhealthy and bitter.

    Some people just won't understand - which is just too bad for them. Think of everything they will be missing out on!
    1665 days ago
    I couldn't agree more with your blog. My friends do that exact thing to me regarding marriage and kids. Im the only single one left and don't quite fit in the group anymore. Some of the comments they say to me on our rare outings are hurtful and couldn't be farther from the truth. Ive been realizing "my friends" don't really know me anymore based on some things they say. Its sad really.
    1665 days ago
  • UFEDAK85
    Unfortunately, there are people who feel as though certain things come with age (slower metabolism, weight gain, etc) and just sit back and accept it. I'm glad that you don't have that mindset! Yes, things may get harder as we get older, but we can still be fit and healthy at any age!

    You are doing great things and don't listen to the naysayers! They are just jealous that you are looking fantastic while they're going the opposite direction of fantastic. emoticon Keep up the great work! We are here to support you!
    1665 days ago
    Sadly this is how some people think but at least you're turning their negativity into positivity. emoticon emoticon .
    1666 days ago
    I think you make them have guilty consciences because you are DOING something to better yourself and they are not. They know they should be. They see your results, and it is a reminder to them of what they could have if they weren't too lazy to work for it. Keep on out-shining them. Your family is so much luckier than theirs are.
    1667 days ago
    It was some time last year, a (former) friend of mine wanted to have a talk with me about how I "let myself go" and wanted to place me on the scale to prove his point. I cursed him out roundly for it.

    We don't have to accept anything "at our age". As BOOZEYFORD says it does get harder, but it isn't impossible. Ignore them for the insecure folks they are. (They don't want to try anyway.)

    Friends encourage. Get a new set of them!
    1667 days ago
    1667 days ago
    It is true that as you get older it gets harder, but that's why your working so hard! You choose to defy the norm and live life the way you want in the body you want even if that means a little hard work and pain. They like many choose to live behind the excuse of age/stress or whatever simply because they are to scared or lazy to TRY. It's possible as they see this as a lifestyle, not a phase that their attitudes will change/soften. Take the challenge to one up them, but don't forget yourself and what's important, your health and happiness.

    Arm candy! Regardless of how catty it may of sounded, take the compliment!
    1667 days ago
    Sometimes people say things like that because they are insecure themselves. It's great that you used this to drive you on and make you continue to work hard ! You will succeed !
    1667 days ago
    Yikes! "Accept that at our age"......"arm candy"........boy, with that kind of attitude, your "friends" are in for a h***uva world of hurt in a few years! Good on you for your positive self-awareness in the face of that stuff 'n nonsense!

    So much for "friends"! You know, that term is bandied about so liberally these days with absolutely NO thought whatsoever as to what that word *really* means!

    Don't let those *turkeys* get you down! (Though from reading your post, I don't think that's too likely!)

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    1667 days ago
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    1668 days ago
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