Tuesday, September 10, 2013
I have a problem. Well, I have lots of problems, but here is the current issue: I can’t stand it when my boyfriend looks at other women. Even if it’s a fleeting glance, it still upsets me. He is a good guy and he doesn’t just stare at other women in front of me, but there are boobs and legs and butt cheeks everywhere, and I’m positive that he sees them and likes what he sees. When we are out in public, I try not to even look at him so I don’t see when he looks at other people, especially women. When I do see him look, I hate him. I hate him and I am disgusted by him, but not nearly as disgusted as I am with myself. I don’t know how to deal with this. I have spoken with him a few times about my feelings and I’ve told him how intense they have been. He has been kind to me and tried to understand, and says that we can work on it together. However, I feel absolutely horrified and insanely jealous when he glances at another woman so I need to get this under control.
Let me just say that I don’t think I am afraid of him leaving me for one of the women he looks at, so saying “but he comes home to you,” isn’t helpful. My thoughts about it may not exactly be logical, but I do realize that he’s not trying to leave me for every woman he sees. I just really need help with this. I’m seeing a therapist and I’m going to talk to her about it tomorrow, but I am really torn up about this tonight. Any advice would be welcome.