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At work and Dad's in the hospital

Friday, September 06, 2013

What is wrong with me? I went to the hospital, saw that Mom was a wreck, and that Dad is doped up, and I gave him a hug, and left Mom with the hospital minister.

Yes, I'm in shock. Dad could be dying this time, and here I am doing my job as usual, trying to figure out my next step. What do I do now? Mom isn't together, and doesn't want to bother any of us with their troubles. I did call my nephew, who called his parents. My other brother is on a hunting trip. My sister is on a remote island doing a concert, but it's a remote island in my half of the world, not her's.

I have power of attorney over their advance directives. I feel like I should be there, just in case. Is that ghoulish, or just my job?
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Go by what you feel is right - not by what other people say. This is truly a tough decision. Use your support systems for help. This is truly a personal decision. Hope all goes well despite this for you and your family. This is coming from a dad who has not lost either parent yet but they are up in their years ie 84 and 82.

    By the way nothing is wrong wlith you. You are doing your best in a very stressful situation.
    1687 days ago

    Comment edited on: 9/7/2013 3:56:47 PM
  • DIANE7786
    emoticon I'm praying for your family. There's nothing wrong with you. You are doing your best by hugging your dad and leaving your mom with a minister who knows exactly what to do and say. The hospital should have copies of your dad's advanced directives. You won't use power of attorney until after his death. His doctors will tell your mom when his time is near. That may be much longer than you think. Visit as of ten as you can. I worked for a large corporation and watched many co-workers face this dilemma. It's awful when no one can ease your heartache. Take comfort in memories of good times with your dad.
    1688 days ago
    Consider your dad's wishes, and consider your own feelings. You won't please everyone. Do what you can, and be kind to yourself.
    1688 days ago
    I am not sure I am the right person to answer this but....When my mom got sick and everyone knew this was it, she wasn't going to get better this time, I didn't leave the hospital other then for my kids and even then I went right back. My little brother was in the military and opted not to come home (he could have he just chose not to), my older brother actually moved into her hospital room and refused to leave (yea he is a handful). Anyway there are little comments made by family and friends that my little brother should have been there and for a while I will admit I was mad at him HOWEVER when I thought about what my mom would have wanted him to do I can in all honesty say she would not have wanted him to be there she knew his position was high and he was very important and she was always very proud of him for his choices, and there wasn't anything that was going to change just because he was there or not, so ask yourself what would your dad want you to do? I hope this helps I will pray for you and your family
    1688 days ago
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