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Reality hits

Monday, September 02, 2013

My crazy family started when I got married 40 years ago. 5 years later, drama stepped in when my brother in law got married. He stayed married 15 years, was single again 3 years and then married again. His ex was a nutrition nut. She tried forcing that on everyone else with a superior attitude of how to live your life. Coming from Italian families, the rest of us were all hefty people, she was not Italian or hefty.

Together they had 4 beautiful children that turned out normal despite everything they went thru. The ex left when their youngest was only 6. My BIL raised them to be fine adults.

Fast forward to present day. Now that the kids are having kids of their own, the ex is back in their lives. I understand, she is still their mother. Yesterday, she announced she has cancer. Tumors on her spine and in her lungs. Her youngest daughter didn't believe her so she called the Dr and yes it's true. Already she lost the use of one leg and is in terrible pain. She had moved out of state and remarried. Now she wants to come back to be with her kids. All of a sudden, they are more important to her than her husband.

I was surprised at how much her situation affected me, how bad I felt for her. She is a year younger than me, fit as a fiddle and did all the right things health wise. Not like me who weight yo yoed and abused my body with tons of bad foods. Cancer shows no mercy. When your number is up, something will come along regardless of what you do. This brought me back to earth about how fleeting life is and how we should savor every minute. Every so often something happens to jar me into reality and makes me appreciate what I have. This time hit me hard. My prayers are with her and I hope she doesn't suffer a lot.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Wow! This is quite a story. I surly can understand her wanting to be close to her children. I feel very bad for her. It is not logical , is it? And part of me wants to be mad at her for trying to change the eating habits of your family. Let bygones be bygones and be compassionate as if you did not know her history. I think that is why we can be compassionate for homeless people, etc. We were not part of their families years ago. We only see their present hurting. My prayers are with her and you. chris
    1722 days ago
    We certainly don't know the number of days the Lord will give each of us. So true that we must make the best of each moment of each day. Your empathy for her situation at this time of her life might just be opportunity for you to give her the support she needs at this time of her life. While being a blessing to her you will be blessed. God grant you peace and strength as you walk through this experience in your life.
    1723 days ago
    In my own opinion, there is no rhyme or reason to things like cancer and other diseases that shorten our health and our lives. I am of firm belief that we are all borne with the cells to cause these diseases, sometimes they develope and sometimes they dont.

    I know people that firmly say, it was the ciggarettes, (lung cancer), It was the booze ( liver disease) and so on, BUT I have known people that have never smoked and never been in second hand smoke, that died the painful death of lung cancer. No to mention also, my landlord that died at 99 years of age...heavy smoker all his life, and died of natural causes.

    Yes, these things can be the reality check, to measure our lives against, in good and bad health. It points us to where we could do better or worse within our own lives, but there are so many factors that can cause these genes to become active. All we can do is be in the best health that we can be for ourselves and hope for the best.

    I am sorry this woman will have an unpleasant time of it, and it is understandable about her children. A lot of people try to correct the mistake s they have made in their lives when they find out an illness such as this. Even if they dont think of it as a mistake they made, they often seek out those they left behind somewhere on life's long road.

    I wish you peace of mind and heart in dealing with this in your life. God bless
    1723 days ago
    You are a compassionate person, good reminder of how quickly life goes by. emoticon
    1723 days ago
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