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Friday, August 23, 2013

Size-ism is a discrimination that people that are overweight or obese experience on a regular basis. It is when other people think people that are overweight or obese are lazy or slobs.

Honestly, I have avoided these people in general. But, now I find myself dating someone with these opinions. In fact, he called who I was before "fat and a slob". I obviously called him on that. He kinda detracted it but I think he still feels that way. Ironically, he says he's a slob. My family is still overweight. Will he feel that way about them? He says he won't because he's not dating them. What if I gain weight? Will he break up with me? He says no. I don't plan on gaining the weight but there is always that possibility on the table.

My mom says I will find someone that will love me no matter what size I am. But, will I? I want someone that can understand my before and after. I don't know if this even possible. I want them to live a healthy lifestyle. It's like the only ones that can understand me are people that have lost a good chunk of weight as well.

I am still trying to figure out how I feel about this. The real question is if I can live with dating someone that has discrimination towards overweight or obese people...
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    My ex-husband told me he wouldn't be able to love me anymore if I ever got over 130 pounds. Thank God I'm no longer married to the jerk! My current husband (celebrating six years last Sunday!) loves me and finds me attractive no matter what I weigh. Now if I can just learn to accept myself the way he does no matter what I weigh......
    1693 days ago
    Yes there are guys out there who will love you no matter what size.

    I am trying to get the hubby to live the healthy lifestyle with me and he is getting there but there is still the cases of Diet Mt Dew and the Reese's dessert in the cupboard. It just drives me nuts that I am doing what I can to be healthy as I get old and he is not. I know that we said in sickness in health but I am not going to be very happy if I am the one with the health and he is the sickness because of how he eats.
    1705 days ago
  • -AMANDA79-
    I'll admit that I struggle with this myself. I've tried to train myself to not make generalizations about overweight people that don't have anything to do with the weight. Thinking that someone is unhealthy or that it is dangerous to be overweight is appropriate. Thinking that someone is lazy, dirty, a slob, etc. just because they are overweight is NOT appropriate. If I've actually witnessed them being a lazy, dirty, slob that's different, but it isn't ok to assume that those characteristics automatically go with being overweight.
    1705 days ago
    1705 days ago
    I would really struggle with it as well. My husband married me at my heaviest and he loves me as I am but he's proud of where I'm going. I tend to hold grudges. I've discovered that I have no intention of buying sportswear from a company that doesn't sell clothes in plus sizes. Companies that do were there for me when I needed it at my heaviest weight so I figure I'll continue to support them even when I can wear other sizes. And I think that I'd feel the same way about a man. Plus, there'd be that constant fear that if I gained weight he'd be a jerk or would just plain leave and I couldn't live feeling like that.

    I'm sorry you're in this situation because it sounds like you're happy with him other than that.
    1705 days ago
    My husband has loved me through lots and lots of sizes, from a skinny 125-pound bride through a 250+pound wife and back down again. Yes, it's possible to find someone who loves you for who you are. It's possible, too, that the guy you're with will change his attitude, but it's true, it seems like the ones who understand the most are those who have been there themselves.
    1705 days ago
  • K1TT3N
    It is possible.. i didn't think it was either but 12 years ago someone found me. I was on a cam site just me playing with my kiddos and got an IM that aid hello beautiful and now we have been married for almost 10 years , have an almost 11 yr daughter to add to my two boys.. and everything is still great. Good Luck it will come when and where you least expect it.
    1705 days ago
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