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Dementia...no respecter of person!

Friday, August 16, 2013

The face of dementia...
Look at her. My mother in law. No one could know she has dementia just by a photo. You'll know right away when she speaks. Dementia is a thief! It steals your memory. It steals your personality. It steals everything that once was an actual human being.
Odd. Back in the day when Gramma was who we knew her to be, she was...well, difficult. She just wasn't a people person. She didn't like to babysit the grandkids or spend much time with them. But all of that is behind us now. Today, gramma is very sweet, pleasant, and yet a chore at the same time. LOL! Who knew things would turn out like this. I have learned a lot of life lessons just by being her care giver alone. My children ask me how I could be so sensitive and patient with her. They seem so bitter. I tell them it is the Lord that helps me do what I have to do to take care of gramma. It's called agape love. Loving someone who doesn't return love. Make no mistake, it is very difficult...or WAS for me in the beginning. Nowadays gramma is no longer the gramma we once knew. Forgiveness is key to any relationship. Life lessons are endless. I can hide behind the door of anger, resentment, or whatever else goes along with negative feelings. What good would it do now? Today, I just trust the Lord to help us do what needs done. My friends have told me I'll get thru this. I tell them I don't want to "just get thru this"! I want to be better! My husband tells me all the time...I don't know how you do it, but I appreciate it! Dementia steals the memory of people, but it also teaches us a host of lessons as well. I try not to dwell on what was or what might be. Instead, even though I cry sometimes, I know for sure God is in it and I believe He knows my heart, and will take care of us...no matter what!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I work with clients with dementia as a home Health Care Nurse, and I can tell you that some families only care about the money and things they may get after passing away. Then there are those that have kindness, amazing care and forgiveness. Those that take care of a person that was mean, gambler, maybe not so great of a parent and get total care and forgiving keep me in “awe”. I can see your kids wondering why, but I can tell you they will remember this and when its your time, they will do so for you.
    110 days ago
    I've been there!
    God Bless!
    234 days ago
    I'm right there with you. Day in, day out. It's an honor and a blessing and lots of lessons – quite an education to be the sole caretaker for a cherished older person with dementia. I do wonder what life will be like for us when we're done caretaking and become the people who are taken care of…
    278 days ago
    Hi Cindy, I came across your post via community posts in the over 50's section. I then read your post requesting prayers. I came over to your blog post about dementia. I also see your a member of a fibromyalgia group. I have fibromyalgia. I was diagnosed in 1995. I'm 56 now. For my adult life career I chose geriatrics. I have worked an Alzheimer's wing. I know how very difficult it is to care for those with dementia and I only had to do it 8 hours at a time. Bless your heart for loving your mother in law and caring for her. Anytime you need an ear or shoulder please drop me a message. Feel free to add me as a spark friend if you'd like. emoticon
    1719 days ago
    Cindy...you are beautiful....inside and out.....God will bless you for your goodness....thank you for sharing the beautiful picture of Gramma....
    1742 days ago
    That's a gracious God hono emoticon ring attitude.
    1743 days ago
    How exciting for you that your eyes have been opened to actually see what is going on. Not just see but learn from it. Way to go girl. I guess there is a reason why you aren't working outside the home. God had plans for you INSIDE the home. Just don't forget your limits (we ALL have them) and give yourself time for God to recharge those batteries that you are using endlessly!! God Bless you Cindy!
    1743 days ago
    I can relate to you my MIL had dementia too and it's hard to take her care of her.
    emoticon to you for giving it all you have and wanting to do more than you actually have to.
    1743 days ago
  • PJ2222
    emoticon emoticon
    1743 days ago
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