Thursday, August 15, 2013
Now that school has started for my daughter and part time school will be starting for me in a couple of weeks, we are going through some adjustment. Schedules and expectations for the days are changing. I can easily admit that I don't like change and I struggle to adopt a more enlightened attitude about it. As a single parent, I feel that my life is fairly chaotic as is. There are many demands on my time and energy that are not shared with a partner. Order is important to me so I don't blow a gasket. When I feel overwhelmed by responsibilities, tasks and deadlines I can be a raging lunatic at the worst and an irritable grump at best. Routine and order in my environment help me to deal with things more productively and to be a nicer person. When routine and order are interrupted *bam* the fear of failure can trigger anxiety and depression. Outside of the negative effects it has on me, that's the LAST thing my daughter needs.
So far this week, I have been keeping fear and anxiety at bay and maintaining optimism. Even though my routine is already experiencing disruption and this is causing me some fear of failure, "one day at a time" is how I'm taking it until the new routine and order are established. The weird silver lining of this is, when I was lamenting to myself that I no longer have the freedom of spending 2 hours at the Y every day, I suddenly realized "Whoah. Hold up! I WANT to spend two hours at the gym every day?!?!" Boy how my life has changed. Yeah, I could easily spend two hours a Y every day if I had the time. That's AWESOME!!!
So great. I've gotten myself to LOVE being active. I LOVE exercise. I have an inner athlete that has been restrained all her life that has been let out and I want to WORK her. The problem with this, at this point in the year, is figuring out when and how. I definitely don't want to regress, fitness wise. It is imperative for me to maintain and improve. This week has been weird already but so far, I've fit in some good runs and a hip hop class. Tonight will be trickier but I am DETERMINED. I am required to actively seek solutions to this issue. I may not be able to get to the Y during the week so much anymore, but I have to find other ways to get in my exercise. One of these solutions, I am afraid, may be to set my alarm an hour earlier in the morning to log some sweating time. This idea strikes fear in me too. Historically, I have never been good at getting up earlier to exercise, especially when sleep is at a premium for me. However, I will be giving this a go again, for the umpteenth time. I MUST get a better attitude about this. C'mon, girl. You can do this.
Another thing: crockpots are good for saving some time the week after work. I love being able to throw stuff in the pot before work and not having to deal with cooking when I get home. I need more HEALTHY crockpot recipes. I will be checking the sparkrecipe site to see what it has to offer. Anything I can do to shave time from my day to apply to exercise is good.