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The Golden Rule in Reverse

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

"Treat others the way you want to be treated." We've heard this our entire lives. The Golden Rule.

I'm one of those people who always puts others first. To be otherwise is selfish, even sinful. But lately I've been thinking. I've been a doormat most of my life. There are lots of people out there like me. You know who you are.

We have a zero tolerance for personal mistakes. We give up on ourselves. At times, I expect perfection from myself with no excuses. Other times, I accept little/no effort when I should be kicking myself in the butt!

Well, I say---It's time to start treating ourselves at least as good as we treat others.

Another saying I hear often is that "We are our own worst critics." This is so true! I've read articles on this subjects and one question asked was "How would employees react if you treated them the way you treat yourself?" For me, I can tell you they would revolt and quit OR they would never get any work done.
It's time to see yourself as equally important. You count, too. I know I don't expect perfection from others nor do I don't accept poor performance or half-hearted efforts from others. Why do I treat myself differently???

Are you treating yourself harsher or more lenient than you treat others? If you met someone like yourself, what would you say to them? Would you expect perfection? Would you tell them that it's ok to do something halfway? OR-- Would you be kind and supportive? Would you gently, tactfully point out shortcomings?

For me, the answers to these questions are simple. I would tell someone that no one is perfect. Don't be so hard on yourself. Your honest best effort is all that's expected.

I know I look for opportunities to be supportive and uplifting to others. It's time I treated myself with the same kindness.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Very Well Said, Emily. I am sure you are speaking for thousands of us here on SparkPeople. I really am doing better with this though. I hope you are, too!

    1714 days ago
    You are absolutely right!
    1714 days ago
    So true, there are a number of articles here on Spark that remind us to speak to ourselves in positive terms. It does matter. When I start "beating myself up" I stop and ask-would you talk to anyone else like this? How would you feel if someelse talked to you this way? So why do you think it is OK to talk to yourself like this, stop it.
    Thanks for the blog-great reminder!
    1714 days ago
    Hi Emily--- A great message here-- Your blog hits home for many of us, doormats! I have truly improved on this over the years, and I do maintain respect for myself now.
    YES-- It is time that you treat yourself with the same kindness you show to others! In other words, we can become our "best friend"--- Thank you!
    1714 days ago
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