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You're nothing but skin and bones!"

Monday, August 05, 2013

So said a friend I ran into in the grocery store today whom I hadn't seen in over a year. I told her I'd worked hard to get to where I am, and she said she thought I'd looked good before. (35 pounds ago!)

Really? I'd been feeling pretty happy with my size. All of a sudden I was wondering if I looked like a walking skeleton...except for my tummy, of course. lol. It refuses to quit being an aggravation. (I hope she thought she was being complimentary to me or showing concern for my health. She's NOT at all a mean person.)

I came home and asked my husband if he thought I looked emaciated. He said "No, but I'd worry if you lost any more."

I'm not planning to lose more. I'm trying to build muscle while maintaining at 125. I've kept it within 2 pounds up or down of my goal for 3+ months now. I am happy with my energy level, endurance and flexibility, and my strength is growing slowly. I'm going to listen instead to the voice of another friend who saw me Saturday for the first time in a year and said "You look great!"
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I used to hate it when someone would say, "Have you been sick?" But I got a whole lot more of the "you look great" kind of compliments at least. I finally decided that many people live in a society of people who are overweight, rarely even seeing an adult at a normal weight. So is it any wonder they don't recognize normal?

    You and me and your doctor all know you've done a wonderful thing for yourself. By the way, at first my hubby thought I'd lost too much, but now he is used to it and likes it. And so do I. Wish I was 125, plus or minus 2 pounds, though. I'm more like 129, plus or minus 4 pounds. (I have been 133 or under for 54 months now.) Still working to try to achieve what you have!! Good job! -Marsha
    1720 days ago
    That was just her perception - as you said, she now is a bit chubby compared to you.

    It's all relative - my short and chubby aunt told me, when I was 5'6" and 145, that I looked willowy. Hardly willowy, just slimmer than I had been (and what I want to get back to).
    1720 days ago
    I've had the same experience and it's disconcerting. But you know you're at a healthy BMI and you look great and feel healthy. The people who gave me those kind of comments were often people who'd felt slim next to the "old me" and felt chubby next to the "new me" and didn't like the change . . . I DID lose "friends" when I lost weight and at the end of the day: that's OK.
    1720 days ago
  • KANOE10
    I have been told that I was too thin..and looked like I was wasting away. I went to my dr and asked her if I looked too thin. She said look great. I have chosen to ignore the people who don't like my new body.

    If your husband thinks you look fine..and you are happy staying at 125..go for it!

    Great job on maintaining.
    1721 days ago
    Do you feel good? I think you look fantastic in your photos! The biggest question would be is your energy level good and do you feel good, because if you do (and you look great, too!) then you're at a healthy weight. :D
    1721 days ago
    It never ceases to amaze me that people think they can make comments like this. She NEVER would have said, "Wow, you're really fat!" So what makes her think she can say you're "skin and bones"?

    I'd say you're in a good place, especially if you feel good and can maintain it! Good going, girl!
    1724 days ago
    I agree with the others. You can't let others determine how you feel. I've had similar comments when I reached my goal weight and I just laugh and tell them I've never felt better. The hardest part is my in-laws who blame DW for not feeding me well. Keep up the great work!
    1724 days ago
  • ROCKMAN6797
    The voice in your head should be your guiding light, others do NOT define you!
    Keep up the great work Joan!
    You are an inspiration to all of us!

    1724 days ago
    Everybody is entitled to their opinion. The only voice that matters is yours.

    1724 days ago
    I know I won't be the first to confirm that you should listen to your inner voice. Only you can determine how you feel physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Keep up the good work and have confidence in the journey you are on.

    1724 days ago
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