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A Pair Of Fresh Eyes

Thursday, August 01, 2013

Okay...the last couple of days have been weird for me.

My husband picked a fight with me...and told me I was "too thin for his tastes."

My coworkers think I've lost "a lot of weight" since the last time they saw me. (That was back at the end of May, for the record.)

BUT I've gained weight!

Seriously! I have. I gained and my body absolutely doesn't want to lose any weight.

So, I said to myself, "Hey, self...why don't you compare a photo of you today with the photo in your profile pic (which was taken in May)?"

Being very proud of my very good idea, I put on the same clothes, stood in the same place, and took a picture. Then using my amazing photoshop skills (*giggle-snort*) I set the two photos side by side.

The pic from May is on the left-hand side. The pic from today is on the right-hand side.

Again, I have to say, I weigh MORE now (right-hand side)

Also, I have to say...I see no difference. If you do, please tell me...because I need to know if I have some sort of short circuit in my brain.

IF there is no difference, why in the last two days has everyone suddenly felt compelled to comment on my weight loss?

I went from 156 to 128...and not a single soul noticed. But I gain weight? Suddenly everyone wants to know my secret. me out Sparkers. I'm at a loss on this one.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    KIKIMAV, that photo is amazing! It really helps to visualize the difference that comes from changing body composition.
    1751 days ago
    I think you look a little slimmer on the right picture! But it is a very subtle change, not obvious at all!
    I think your co-workers noticed now your former weight loss, because they had not seen you for a very long time, while when they were seeing you every day, you were looking the same as "yesterday".

    About your hubby's firm belief that you are thinner now, maybe he is right! We all know that muscle weight more than fat, but let me give you a visual

    I mean , I already knew that in theory, but the picture is quite impressive!!!
    1751 days ago

    Comment edited on: 8/3/2013 2:18:12 PM
  • DR1939
    Sometimes weight loss in a spouse frightens a person. They worry that now that the spouse looks so good they will want someone else. It's similar to what happens when a woman returns to college. Is it really for better health/better education or is it to prepare for an exit from the relationship. Perhaps you need to talk to him about why he believes you are losing weight and shaping up. BTW, the same mechanism functions in friend relationships because we choose our friends (and our lovers) based on their similarity to us (solid research on this) so if your relationship is based on attractiveness similarity and you suddenly become more attractive the relationship is not in balance. Again, talk to your friends about why they believe you are changing and if they think it will disrupt the relationship, perhaps reassuring them that you see the relationship based on other things besides attractiveness. You do have to be careful that the friend/spouse does not think that you are declaring yourself the most attractive emoticon
    1752 days ago
    Asking your husband a question like that?!? Pure, unadulterated evil!
    (I'm so proud of you!) That must have induced a lovely state of panic!

    You got the Man and I chatting about this last night, since we'd had a disagreement a couple of months ago where he claimed he could see that I'd lost weight but nobody else could see it (including me). We concluded that it wasn't so much that I *looked* different, but he knew that I *felt* different and so could "see" the changes. I wonder if your hubby isn't doing the same thing - knowing that you *feel* smaller to him, and so is looking for the changes that he knows are there.

    (By the way --- he laughed his head off with your response to him --- and feels ever-so-nicely put in his place! Yay for well-done sarcasm!)

    Hope both of you are feeling better about the conclusion of the current episode of "body composition vs the scale entity".

    Have a great weekend!
    1752 days ago
    I showed the pics to my husband last night and said, "Okay, in which one of these pictures do I weigh less?"

    You should have seen his horrified expression. He replied, "I don't want to play this game. It's some sort of a trap."

    I told him not to worry to just pick one. So, he picked the one on the right. When I said I weighed MORE in that photo he asked, "Are you SURE?"

    I think it made him feel better to know that I haven't really been losing weight, just gaining muscle and replacing the fat.
    1752 days ago
    I say you look firmer in the right photo which would mean more muscle. Muscle weighs more than fat!
    1752 days ago
    I think you look good in both photos. It's hard for me to say for sure I see any "real" difference because despite your Photoshop skills there are still subtle differences in lighting and angle.

    As an unmarried person I can't say from the inside what I would do in such a situation, but overall I think we need to be accepted for the bodies WE want to have, not by what others want.

    On the other hand, my bf has lost about 20 lbs in the last 4 months since we started going out and I don't think I want to see him lose much more because he'll start to look gaunt. So maybe I'm doing the same thing.

    Not a huge fan of the "canned" articles here on SP, but this one might offer some insight or at least solace that you're not alone:

    1752 days ago

    Comment edited on: 8/2/2013 7:54:45 AM
  • DS9KIE
    woo wee you look emoticon
    1753 days ago
    You look smaller on the right.

    If your coworkers are commenting now, it's probably that they didn't see you for a while so the loss suddenly became more noticeable.

    I've gone through what you're experiencing with the scale vs. true size. it's disconcerting because you have this idea of what you look like at a certain weight, but once you start adding muscle it's just not the same ball game anymore. For me, it was the thing that broke my reliance on the scale as my major indicator of progress.
    1753 days ago
    Well, since we know that The Man is always correct, I am forced to believe that his assertions are true.

    I will have to simply accept my new, awesome muscles.
    1753 days ago
    I've consulted the Man on this (since I can't be trusted) and he says that he sees a difference mostly in your legs from just above the knee and up (pretty much through the quads), but also noted leaner forearms. He picked the new pic as being the lower weight, so I'd think it's all that lovely muscle fooling your scale entity...
    1753 days ago
    YOUDUNN, I thought maybe it was because I'm standing up straighter...since I have stronger muscles in my back now. So, you could be right about that.
    1753 days ago
    Maybe what they are tuning into is your self-confidence?
    What a fun way to check things out for yourself. It must be confidence.
    You are doing great!
    1753 days ago
    Thanks PIXIECUTE!

    My scale often lies to me. We've never really gotten along. I think it may be possessed by an evil entity of some sort.
    1753 days ago
    You waist does look slimmer... I don't know why the scale is lying to you :) haha. Sometimes it's about the right outfit... maybe the clothes you've been wearing this week have highlighted your progress, and it gave everyone the chance to notice.
    I'm sorry your hubby & you fought... maybe he was just in a bad mood and wanted to pick a fight? Good luck - either way you look great :)
    1753 days ago
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