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A Moody, 'What If" Kind Of Day!

Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Today started out like any other day, woke up to sunshine, did my 15 minute morning lifts, crunches etc! Got up , had a shower, a day like many others, so why when I went for breakfast, did I have this urge to just stuff myself with food,had a bowl of cereal, some fruit, still hungry, made a slice of toast, had some tea, still wanted something! What's the matter?? I just got myself right out of that kitchen, grabbed my walker and went for a walk around the neighborhood, met some neighbors and had a nice chat, then continued on, well the mood did not dispel, it changed into something else, I was watching people older than me so agile, walking unaided, no cane, no walker, then the regrets started in my mind, if I had only listened and got this weight off, if I had only exercised more, all the~ what ifs~ running around in my head!

Why am I having this kind of day? I wake everyday to pain so that is nothing new, I realize all the things I should have done, thought I made peace with that! I am trying to make things better, it is a slow process, but nevertheless it is process! I am no miracle worker lol!
I think as I am venting this out, I do indeed have anger toward myself for allowing things to get so out of hand...2 knee replacements, a pending shoulder replacement, bad feet, spinal stenouses, diabetes, kidney disease..what was I thinking, why did I let things go so? My head was buried so deep in the sand!

I should be grateful that I am still here, trying to regain some health back, I wrote this blog so others in my predicament will take action before it gets to my stage, there is nothing in this world more important than ones health, without it you are " up a creek without a paddle"
Trying to bring more health to my body is now a very painful thing, but I refuse to give up, I pray everyday that God gives me the strength to follow through!
Well I'm glad I got all that off my chest, hope my day goes better, and I settle down..time to do more, TNT....

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • JJ4493
    I hope that today found you in a much happier place than when the original blog was written. One day at a time is the best that we all have to offer. Keep moving forward and let those regrets be a thing of the past...right where they belong!

    What a wonderful "can do" attitude you have! emoticon

    Jayma emoticon
    1753 days ago
  • KATI5668
    I know the kind of day you are talking about..& hopefully by now it has passed.

    We all need to vent from time to time & your vent may very well help someone chose

    a different path. Good expression of the frustration that we all feel from time to time.

    You are moving forward & doing what you can today..that is important.

    We need to be like our animals..they live in today..what happens today..what the day

    will bring ..then they sleep & start all over with a fresh mind & body!

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1758 days ago
    I love how you're not being selfish but are sharing great information to others so that they may make the necessary changes in their life. Also know even in spite of your limitations you're being the you you can be. Thanks so much for sharing.

    1758 days ago
    emoticon I think we all have those sorts of days sometimes. You're doing you're very best now, nobody can do more than that, and some never do that much. I see them at the gym merely going through the motions, and chatting all through the water aerobics, so keep it up my friend. emoticon
    1759 days ago
    1759 days ago
  • SHERA8805

    My thought and prayers are with you and I will learn by your story
    1759 days ago
    All of us have these kind of days! Lately, I have more than I'd like but I know that I can
    change it. So having said that and read your blog, I am going to get on my workout clothes and get to it! Thanks for the inspiration! emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1759 days ago
    It's certainly not easy to do anything when you are in pain (and since I have also had 2 knee replacements I remember only too well how hard it was to move around when I was in pain) You are right that thinking about what might have been isn't going to be very productive or useful. You ARE moving forward - think about how many NSV's you've had too. Keep at it - maybe it's one step backwards but now it's time for two steps forward!
    1759 days ago
    I have diabetes and high blood pressure. My knees hurt when I walk up the stairs. I lost 30 lbs last year and have put 18 lbs back on. You have inspired me to go to the health club this morning and walk in the water. I was going to blow it off today. We can do this. I want to be in good shape to watch my 4 year old twin grandson grow up. I'm going to eat breakfast and get out of here. Have a wonderful day.
    1759 days ago
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1759 days ago
    Sweetheart.. Today is a new day .. Yesterdays all of them are over.. MOVE Forward .. Forgive yourself and MOVE today however you can .. Make smarter choices today however you can.. LOVE YOURSELF TODAY !!

    hugs and love,
    1759 days ago
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