Day 6 - Studying Rat Tricks
Tuesday, July 23, 2013
For the most part I don't consume much dairy. I have a mild allergy to it and stay away. Today I was wanting to eat something different for a change and at the market I saw some ricotta cheese and went for it. I had some with some raspberries and it did the trick.
I mention this because I am trying to observe the difference between me and my slender boyfriend. We are different kinds of eaters. I love a plate full of food and the activity of eating. He loves rich foods but in tiny amounts and I don't think he really enjoys eating like I do. Odd as he is a very well known chef. For example, if I were to eat buffalo wings I would love every bit off that thing and get the sauce on my fingers and enjoy that too. It is all part of it. He on the other hand cannot stand to have messy fingers and will take one or two bites of a wing and leave most of the meat on there because the rest is too much trouble for him to mess with. I notice other thin people eat that way.
This train of thought has been on my mind since I watched my little cousin's 2 rats eat. One is thin and the other is quite fat and they are both brothers. The thin rat takes it little yogurt covered nut and very slowly nibbles it, even leaving crumbs behind. Then he is off and running and no longer interested in food. The fat rat gobbles his up and begs for more. If he doesn't get any he goes to the food bowl and spends some time stuffing his face with regular food. Then he goes to my little cousin and sits on her shoulder. These are two brothers with very different behaviors and probably a slightly different genetic code.
I realize I will always be having to watch my weight. My father was a diabetic and my mother is prediabetic and when I don't watch myself I am on the high side of normal sugar levels. One wrong move and I could be a diabetic. I am naturally like the fat rat. That's OK and that rat is really sweet and cute. However, I wonder if I can train myself to be less in love with the process of eating and more in love with a little bit of flavor. I've tried in the past the meditative way of eating but frankly it didn't change anything for me.
My goal for my life and my body is to get to a dress size and stick to it and feel good. Right now I'm pushing a 12. I like being a 10 and love being an 8 but always struggled to keep it. I don't know what I will end up being because I will reevaluate half way to my goal. I'm tired of owning 3 different sizes of clothes. It is expensive and a waste of closet space. I want to be a size and stay there.
So, can I learn to behave like the thin rat? I will let you know.