Self-Hating ... I refuse to eat these emotions!
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
I have been having a relatively good day today, food-wise. Other than consuming more fat than I would like to have (I tried a new recipe - turns out it is good, but not good for you) - but still remaining within my allotted amount - my day has gone really well.
I even managed to go to the grocery store without splurging on treats or junk food (yay, me!).... however, I am now fighting the biggest urge to eat my emotions after hearing some disappointing news - the guy I've been liking for the past couple months just officially told people that he is "in a relationship." My immediate response? "If only you weren't so fat, maybe he'd like you" and of course, "Well, she's probably really skinny and beautiful." I really want to stuff my face right now... I haven't made enough of a progress (weight-loss or confidence-building wise) to NOT let this disappointment bring me down. I know he is "just a guy," but when you are as shy as I am, they don't come around very often. I'm feeling blue.
Member Comments About This Blog Post
Thank you, guys. I really appreciate your encouragement - more than you can know! I find it so difficult to be "passed over" for tiny size 2 girls... one day, someone will appreciate my curves (because, even if I lost all of my desired weight, I'd still never fit into a size 2 - my bone structure is quite large, even at my skinniest! Grr... it makes losing weight not as fulfilling! Oh, well!)
1801 days ago
So sorry :( It's always tough when you have an emotional blow like that.
But your title to this blog post says it all: "I refuse to eat these emotions!" Exactly, there are so many other productive things to do in this situation. Blogging about it is a good option. Maybe finding other ways to meet people (volunteering, joining the Jaycees, etc.) might also help.
Hang in there!
1803 days ago
My heart is with you.
First, you are beautiful! Who you ARE speaks to the world.
Second, prepare for the emotional roller coaster:
Find a scripture that speaks to you.
find a friend.
Buy your favorite fruit - the kind you consider a splurge - and keep lots of it in the fridge for the next few days.
find some strong music. Whatever you like. spend time looking for a song that says just what you feel, or want to feel. Try the new song "Beautiful"
every time you want to eat that cupcake, or whatever your emotional eating trigger is, stop the world, play that song, eat that fruit, call that friend - give yourself a ten minute positive experience.
You can do this!
1803 days ago
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