Wednesday, July 10, 2013
Hi! Yes I just put a Z in there, trying to be creative.
Crazy days. I worked 12 hour days Mon & Tuesday (7-7). Both nights I came home and BF had made dinner and did the dishes and all. I am SO thankful for him I can’t even express it. We bought this “Cooking Light” (like the magazine!) premade bake that says “Sometimes even healthy cooks need a break!” on the side. It was pretty good and BF could easily make it. I recommend it for those of you that need something like that on hand in a pinch!
Both of my big projects wrapped up last night so I am trying to reorient my brain today. Mexico is in THREE DAYS. I have yet to pack a single thing. I’m starting to freak a little bit, the planner in me is going crazy now that my brain has space to do so. I am starting to get ridiculously excited. I know I should be working out like crazy but I’m accepting myself as who I am and that is who is going to this island and wearing bathing suits and who cares? It can rain the whole time but I won’t be at work or in my daily routine and I’ll never see these people again – so yeah I’m going to enjoy myself and not care what people think of my lumps in a bathing suit. I do not want to hold myself back from having fun by wasting energy beating myself up. I also know that food & booze will be had, and that I can come back afterwards and get right back into my planning/exercising/cooking routine. The goal of this trip is really to shut my brain (and phone!) off, spend time connecting with my BF, and FINALLY seeing blue water! I swear it feels like seeing Disney world for the first time – BLUE FREAKING WATER. Isla Mujeres is known for reefs, diving, snorkeling and all that. I just can’t wait to be a part of it myself. Never thought this day would come!
BF and I have also identified a few possible places to move, so that change will be coming up soon too. We got approved for a seriously cool but expensive place. Again, one of those things that I never thought I’d do in my life – move to some artsy, well protected, clean and quiet place with a seriously awesome gym. We will see what works out though!
If you can’t tell, I’ve been realizing more and more lately that I let my brain hold me back from A LOT. “Oh, I don’t deserve a vacation like this! How could little ol’ me live in such a cool apartment? Oh I couldn’t possibly buy myself a new shirt, I’m too fat!” and stuff like that. WHY?!?!?! I’m trying to SHUT THIS DOWN. Thinking positively is one thing, but holding yourself back? That is just a shame. I am really working on hearing and stopping that little voice.
OH! I finally got the comprehensive results on my heart stuff back from the doc. I DO have extra beats, but they seem to be the harmless kind. So I’m not crazy! We’re going to keep an eye on it. My doctor wants me to let her know if I experience anything crazy while working out and all. I’m going to get back into the WALKING routine soon and focus on building the speed and distance of THAT before trying to run again. I need to convince myself that walking DOES equal fitness and I don’t need to be some marathon runner to feel like I burned some calories. I am going to do some more research and write up an ST plan too. Very important!
All that being said, I haven’t weighed myself in a while. I am probably more okay with that than I should be. I haven’t been BAD, actually we’ve been eating at home a lot, I just haven’t been working out. Now I know that my heart isn’t trying to kill me and I can get back into it. BF and I didn’t even buy groceries this week because of the trip, and I still haven’t fallen apart so I’m thinking some of these healthy habits are actually stickin’! BUT I’m thinking the post-vacation weigh in will be a good time to kick myself in the butt again so… guess I’ll be there in go mode after next week!
Hope all of you are doing well, and please feel free to share your fave ST moves with me, I’m gathering and planning! Also - any BEACH reads you like?! I'm trying to collect favorite books too! THANKS!